The Last Thing You Never See
by soccerchic6
Summary: In Cami's line of work, you shoot quick and you shoot clean - no feelings involved. That is, until she joins Sheppard's team and meets a certain Satedan. Danger, Adventure...Love? Welcome to Atlantis. Ronon/OC with Sheppard/Teyla
1. Small Universe

**So, basically, I'm new to the Stargate: Atlantis universe, and I'm apologizing in advance if anything seems a bit off or doesn't make sense. **

**This story will follow my OC, Camila Buchanan, and her adjustment into the Atlantis expedition. I've set the story in the third season…pretty much sometime after "Echoes". I plan to follow my own storyline as I'm guessing everyone out there is familiar with the series, and it would seem a bit redundant to rehash everything. However, there **_**will **_**be some episodes that are mentioned or included in the story (though, it will focus more on Camila than what's going on in the episode itself). This will be a Ronon/OC with Sheppard/Teyla as well. **

**Rated "T" for language.**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Stargate: Atlantis or any of its wonderful characters.**

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><p>Camila Buchanan eyed her twin brother over the slice of pizza in her hand. The television blared in the background, the announcer going over the weekend football highlights. She took a bite, chewing slowly as she tried to come up with the best way to tell him she was leaving indefinitely.<p>

For his part, Cruz Buchanan seemed oblivious to his sister's plight. He gestured wildly at the television, yelling a few obscenities when they showed a replay of the play that cost his team the win. When she didn't react, he looked at her curiously.

"What's up with you? You've barely said anything all night." He took a swig of his beer, leaning over the table to grab another pizza slice.

Cami's light green eyes flicked over to his brown ones. She placed her pizza back in the box, then wiped her hands on a napkin. Thinking about never seeing her family again made her appetite disappear. She grabbed her own beer bottle, taking a long drink while her mind played over recent events.

"I'm going away," Cami said carefully. She lowered her gaze on the beer bottle in her hand.

"Yeah?" Cruz asked, taking a huge bite of his pizza slice and talking between mouthfuls. "Finally going to England like you always wanted?"

"No, this is..." Cami took a deep breath trying to figure out the best way to explain. "This is for the marines. I got chosen as part of a search and rescue team."

"Search and rescue, seriously?" Cruz grabbed a napkin and hastily wiped his mouth. He leaned back in his chair, taking another swig of his beer. "What about First Recon?"

She sighed. The decision to leave her beloved sniper unit had been hard. "I've been reassigned. It's a classified mission," she said slowly.

Her brother frowned, placing his beer bottle back on the table and crossing his arms over his chest. "Afghanistan...again?"

Cami shook her head to assuage her brother's fears. "You wouldn't believe it even if I told you."

"Try me," he said, eyes narrowed.

Cami took another long drink of her beer, essentially chugging it until nothing was left. She wracked her mind trying to think of a viable location her brother would find acceptable, but she couldn't really think of anything. After a few seconds, she finally decided to just tell him the truth. It wasn't like she had been sworn to secrecy. Besides, if there would be anyone in the world she could tell, it would be her twin brother. He would understand...eventually.

"Atlantis," she finally said, her eyes unflinching.

Cruz stared at her for a few seconds before bursting out into a laugh. He stood up, picking up the pizza box and going to the kitchen to place it on the counter. He stopped by the fridge to pick up a couple more beers, then sat back down at the table.

"Seriously," he said, opening a bottle and offering it to her. "Where are you going to be stationed?"

"Atlantis," she said again, taking the beer and gripping it in both hands.

Cruz smiled, shaking his head in disbelief. "Cam..."

"Cruz, I know it's hard to believe. Hell, even _I _didn't believe it when I was first told, but it's true."

He continued to stare at her, the smile on his face slowly fading as he began to realize how serious she was. _Maybe this is why they don't swear you to secrecy_, she thought. _Because no one would believe you if you told them_.

"Okay," Cruz said, leaning over the table as he processed what she had just told him. "Say you _are _telling the truth. How did this happen? Did some aliens come to you in your sleep and tell you of the existence of this lost city?"

Cami rolled her eyes at him, though the idea was a bit comical. She threw him a balled up napkin. "I _am _telling the truth, smartass. My team was called in for a physical a few weeks ago. But it wasn't a regular physical...you know, like how they check your height, weight, eyesight and stuff."

Cruz nodded, still staring at her disbelievingly.

"They did some blood work, too. Some guys visited me at the base a few days later. They said they were from some agency called 'Stargate Command' - "

"'Stargate Command'?" Cruz interrupted, his voice laced with skepticism.

"It's a top secret military organization," Cami replied, very aware of how unbelievable it sounded. "Anyway, they said they were impressed by my military record and wanted to recruit me for an ongoing expedition. To make a long story short, the city of Atlantis was discovered about three years ago, and they were building a new team to send as reinforcements. They mentioned that I have some kind of gene that can activate certain technology on Atlantis."

"A 'gene'? I don't know, Cami, this all sounds like bullshit to me." He opened his arms wide as if to emphasize his point. "These guys just _happened_ to know you have this...this _gene_ that can help them operate the city of _Atlantis_?"

"Cruz, they ran tests on all my team, not just me. I was the only one with the gene, and I was the only one chosen for the Atlantis expedition." She looked down at the table, running her finger along a nick engraved on the wooden surface. "They kinda made it seem like they've been testing _everyone _in the military for this particular gene."

Cruz opened his mouth to say something, and then leaned back in his seat, brows furrowing as if he had just remembered something.

"Holy shit..."

"What?" Her eyes snapped back to his face.

"I just remembered...my unit got called in for a physical about a month ago, too. That son of a bitch, Anderson, was reassigned a week later."

"Anderson?" Cami frowned, a sudden thought crossing through her mind. "As in Major Keith Anderson?"

"Major Keith Got-A-Stick-Up-His-Ass Anderson? Yeah. That guy is a pain in the ass. Thinks he's better than everybody. He always hated me for some reason. Probably because I always beat him at everything." Cruz chuckled, thinking about all the ways he had bested Anderson. Then, something seemed to register in his mind. He gave her a sharp look. "No."

Cami nodded, confirming his suspicions. "I'm afraid so."

"Fuck," he whispered.

"Ditto." She let out a sigh already regretting taking on the assignment. "Maybe he's only a douche to _you_," she suggested. "I mean, you _can _be a bit of an asshole sometimes."

Cruz rolled his eyes at her. "Keep thinking that if it makes you feel better. That guy's an ass to anybody and everybody. Wait 'til he finds out you're my sister."

Cami groaned. "Damn it, Cruz! Why'd you have to get on the guy's bad side?"

He barked out a laugh. "Don't tell me..."

"Yeah, you bastard. He's my team leader." She rubbed her hands over her face, grovelling at the idea of serving under a guy like Anderson.

"Wait a minute," Cruz suddenly spoke up, his laughter dying down as he realized something. "How come _I _wasn't visited by the guys from Stargate Command? We're twins, we should have the same genes, right?"

"How should I know?" She shrugged. "Maybe you have the gene but they only recruited a certain number of people?"

He shook his head looking a bit dejected. "No, that doesn't sound right. This expedition sounds huge...and judging by the amount of personnel they're testing..."

Cami shot him a sympathetic look. They stayed quiet for a few minutes, each lost in their own thoughts. She looked down at the tattoo on her wrist...the Roman numeral two, the same tattoo Cruz had on his own body.

"When do you leave?" he finally asked, the question she had been dreading since she had first mentioned she was being reassigned.

"Tomorrow." There was a slight pause while she waited for him to digest the information. "I-I don't know when..._if _I'll be back."

"Gavin and Alec?" he asked, referring to their two older brothers.

"I spoke to them earlier. They don't know the details, but I told them I would be gone for a while."

Cruz stood up suddenly and disappeared into his room. Cami remained at the table unsure what to make of his sudden departure.

"Cruz?" she called out after him, not sure whether to follow him or not.

"Here," he said, walking back into the dining area and placing two combat knives on the table. "I know they're not standard military, but who knows what you'll run into over there."

"Your Kukri knives? I can't take these." She pushed them back towards him.

"Who said anything about taking them? I'm only gonna let you borrow them. You better bring them back to me in one piece."

Cami blinked back tears, the reality of the situation suddenly hitting her full force. She was leaving everything - everyone - behind. Her fingers lightly touched the hilts of her brother's favorite knives.

"Thanks," she finally whispered, her voice hoarse with emotion. She took a few minutes to regain her composure and then spoke up again, a hint of a smile touching her lips. "Cruz, if you tell anyone where I'm stationed, I'm gonna have to kill you."

Her brother smiled back, getting her to her feet to give her a big hug. "And if anything happens to my combat knives," he whispered in her ear, "I'll kill _you_."


	2. It's a Rescue

**Thank you so much for the reviews and alerts! Just a quick note to say that the Kinji warriors are made up by me. They will be showing up later in the storyline as well. **

**On another note, I forgot to mention last time that "First Recon" and their motto, "The last thing you never see", belong to Bethesda (makers of the video game Fallout: New Vegas – which is where I got it from). **

**Once again, thank you for taking the time to read this! :)**

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><p>"I have a shot," Camila whispered, the enemy's head perfectly aligned with her scope. "Permission to engage."<p>

She waited a little impatiently for the order. Slowly releasing her breath, she followed the man's movements as he paced back and forth in front of his prisoners. She counted six total - Kinji warriors was what Dr. Weir had called them, though the head of the Atlantis expedition had admitted that they knew little of them. The Kinji reminded Cami of those tribal bands that lived in the South American jungles. While their weapons and clothing looked primitive, they carried themselves with such fierceness that Cami was sure they were a race to be reckoned with.

"_That's a negative, Captain_," Major Anderson's voice finally came through her ear piece.

She frowned, her finger hovering over the trigger. "Sir?"

"_Do not engage_."

Cami rolled her neck but kept her eye on her quarry. The log she was using as cover also provided a platform on which to rest her sniper rifle. She was half sitting, half lying on the mossy ground. The man she had been observing - who she took to be the leader - moved behind a cluster of trees, and she cursed under her breath adjusting her scope to make a sweep of the area. It took her a little while considering they were in the middle of a freakin' forest. The thick trees provided good cover but also impeded her line of sight.

She scanned the prisoners, making sure they were still okay. There were being held in a clearing of the woods. All had their hands tied, kneeling on the ground. Lt. Colonel Sheppard looked a little beaten, as did the three crew members that were with him. The dreadlocked man on Sheppard's right - Ronon, from what Cami remembered of Weir's hasty briefing - looked more angry than injured. He kept growling and making attempts to attack the two men that were holding him down even with his hands tied behind his back. The beautiful, bronze-skinned woman, Teyla, on Sheppard's left was unusually calm. Her face retained a peaceful facade, yet there was a fire in her eyes that equaled Ronon's behavior. The last crew member, Dr. Rodney McKay, looked frightened. His eyes were opened wide, and he seemed resigned to their fate.

The warrior she was tracking came back into view, along with the other four companions. They seemed agitated. Cami held her breath, steadying her gun. She could almost feel the tension between the six enemies, and she had the gut feeling that something bad was about to happen.

"Major, what's your ETA?" she whispered, her finger once again poised near the trigger.

"_About fifteen minutes. We just secured Lorne and his team, but Brody and Reynolds are headed to your position_." Anderson's voice trailed off, and she could picture the rest of the team trying to travel as quietly as possible over the rough terrain. "_Buchanan, maintain your position. Do not engage the enemy until I give the order, understood?_"

Two of the warriors suddenly lunged forward, grabbing Sheppard and dragging him forward. Cami tensed, barely paying attention to Anderson's voice barking orders into her ear piece. The leader stepped forward raising a sword high above his head. Time slowed down for Cami. The cries of alarm from Sheppard's team were drowned out as she focused on her shot. She could feel the pounding of every beat of her heart as she released her breath.

She took the shot. The bullet sliced through both the leader's head and into one of the men holding Sheppard.

"Change of plans, sir," she breathed into her headset as the two warriors crumpled to the floor.

Through her scope, she noted that Sheppard looked around in surprise, searching for whoever had shot the Kinji. Shouldering her sniper, she took out her pistols and leapt over the log she had been using as cover.

"_Buchanan!_" Anderson's snarled, but Cami was too far in to back out now.

She beelined it to the second man holding Sheppard, taking advantage of his momentary shock. She emptied both her pistols into his chest before he even had a chance to figure out what was going on. At the same time, Ronon stood, headbutting one of his captors and kicking the other in the stomach. He jumped up, swinging his arms forward like a jump rope. Cami barely had time to marvel at the man's agility.

In one quick move, she dropped her empty clips and reloaded her pistols. The remaining two Kinji were fleeing, and the last thing she needed was for them to run off and bring back-up. The adrenaline surged through her veins as she rushed to Sheppard and his team. She stopped long enough to drop one combat knife, her sniper rifle and a pistol at his side and continued running after the last two warriors.

"Wait!" Sheppard called out behind her. "The spear tips...they're poisoned!"

Cami was too focused on the fleeing warriors to shout back a reply. Instead, she waved a hand in the air to show that she had heard him. Her eyes caught sight of an overturned tree. The angle at which it lay was perfect. She increased her speed, then jumped up, vaulting off the trunk. Twisting in the air, she swung her leg around full force, her boot connecting with one of the Kinji warriors with a sickening crunch. The man clutched at his face, falling to the floor in pain. The other came around and swung his spear in an arc, the butt of his weapon striking her arm, causing her to drop her pistol, and then traveling up to slam into the side of her face.

"Son of a bitch," she groaned, her head throbbing in pain. The thin flesh covering her left eyebrow had ripped open. Blood gushed from the wound, trailing down the left side of her face.

She hastily wiped the blood away and unsheathed her other combat knife. The curved blade glinted in the sun. The warrior charged at her, and she quickly countered his attack. Their weapons clanked together in mid air. It was a battle of strength as each tried to force the other to surrender. He pushed forward, forcing her to walk backwards until she tripped over a root. The warrior fell on top of her, his body pressed against her, breath hot on her face. He snarled, saliva stringing from his mouth and onto her neck. The tip of his spear hovered dangerously close to her face, and it was all Cami could do keep it away from her.

Blood continued to stream down her face blinding her in one eye. She looked away from him, her gaze inadvertently making contact with her pistol not even a foot away. Her knee jerked up into his groin, and he rolled over in pain. She reached out, her fingers grasping the pistol just as he came bearing down on her again. Three shots into his chest, and he finally went down.

A twig snapped behind her, and she craned her neck. The upside down figure of the warrior she had kicked earlier was in her sights. She brought the pistol around over her head. He had his arms poised in mid air about to lance his spear. She shot him at the same time a blade slice through his neck. His body fell to the ground with a low thud.

Ronon appeared through the trees, his gaze searching for her until he found her lying on the ground, chest heaving, pistol pointed in his direction. He reached down and pulled her up a little too forcefully causing her to stumble forward.

"Jesus, you trying to fling me across the forest or something?"

"You missed one," he said, ignoring her sarcasm.

"I never miss." She holstered her pistol and walked over to the thug's body, nudging his head with her boot. "See?" Cami pointed to the bullet hole between his eyes.

He grunted in response but said nothing. Cami took her two combat knives from his hands and sheathed them into the scabbards strapped to her back. She made her way back to Sheppard, Ronon trailing not far behind.

"Colonel Sheppard, I'm Captain Camila Buchanan...part of your new search and rescue squad." She offered him a quick salute before wiping the blood off her face with the back of her hand.

Sheppard nodded in greeting. "I thought you guys were arriving tomorrow."

"We were stationed at Stargate Command getting briefed on our new assignment when Dr. Weir contacted SGC informing them that she had lost contact with yours and Major Lorne's teams, sir. Needless to say, we deployed right away."

"This is all nice and dandy, but can we can a move on, please?" McKay interrupted. "_Really_ don't want to be here when more of those...those _beasts_arrive."

Sheppard nodded again, signaling for Ronon and Teyla to fall out. Cami tapped her ear piece.

"Major Anderson, Colonel Sheppard's team is secure. We are falling back to the gate."

"_Copy that. Everyone, fall back to the gate_."

"Where's the rest of your unit?" Sheppard asked as he fell into line with her.

"We split up to cover more land and find you. They're all heading to the gate now, along with Major Lorne's team," she replied, offering her water canteen to them. "Are you guys okay?"

"We are now," he replied. "Looks like we won't be setting up trade with the Kinji any time soon." He let out a sarcastic laugh. "Bastards ambushed us on our way to the gate. You showed up just in time."

Cami opened her mouth to say something but was interrupted by the arrival of the rest of her team along with Lorne's unit. She stepped aside as Anderson introduced himself to Sheppard and they went through a run down of the overall mission. Cami frowned, an uncomfortable feeling setting over her. She had the sensation that someone was watching her.

She looked over her shoulder to find Ronon's green eyes staring at her. He lagged behind, covering their six. Though, instead of looking out at the horizon for danger, his gaze was directed at her. She shot him a look as if to say, "Why the hell are you staring at me?", but he made no response. His eyes darkened, brows furrowing as if he was trying to contemplate something.

After a few seconds, she finally turned back, almost cheering out loud when she realized they had reached the stargate. McKay dialed out, and Cami stared in awe as the gate activated. She knew she would eventually get used to seeing it, but, as a newcomer, everything still seemed so surreal.

They stepped through, her stomach giving a little lurch as she traveled through the wormhole. When they stepped out in Atlantis, she was ordered by Sheppard to go to the infirmary. But not before Anderson pulled her to the side.

"Don't think you're in the clear because you saved Sheppard's team, _Captain_," he spat. "We'll have a talk about your behavior later."

"Sir," she protested. "I apologize for my actions, but - "

"I said _later_, Buchanan," he interrupted. "Understood?"

Cami bit back a retort and swallowed hard. "Yes, sir." He left her glaring at his retreating back.

She turned to find Ronon leaning against a wall, arms crossed over his chest, still staring at her.

"Problem?" he asked, pushing off the wall.

"Nothing I can't handle," she lied. In reality, she was worried. She turned her glare to Ronon. "What are you, my babysitter?"

"Sheppard asked me to take you to the infirmary."

"I can find it myself, thank you. Just point me in the right direction." She looked away from him, a bit embarrassed that he had witnessed Anderson's admonishment.

"Fine," Ronon grunted, throwing his hands up in exasperation. "Through there." He pointed off to her right then disappeared in the opposite direction.

She knew she had done the right thing in saving Sheppard's team, but why had Anderson made it feel so wrong? Disappointment flowed through her as she thought about what Anderson would tell her. She had a feeling he was going to do more than reprimand her. She blinked back tears of frustration and then took a deep breath to calm down.

She hadn't even lasted a day.


	3. Welcome to Atlantis

**Wow! Thanks so much for the reviews and alerts! I'm glad that you guys are enjoying the story so far. :D **

**I decided to upload a few days early because I'll be out of town this weekend. I hope you continue to enjoy the story!**

***Military term: FNG = Freakin' New Guy **

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><p>Camila sat on a bed in the infirmary, feet dangling as she waited for the doctor to make his rounds. She had managed to clean up a little. One of the nurses had been kind enough to provide her with a damp washcloth which Cami had used to wipe most of the dried blood and sweat off of her face. The blood from her cut had now formed a thin crust over her eyebrow making it itch a little, but she resisted the urge to scratch lest she open it up again. She removed her vest and knife scabbard, placing them at the foot of the bed just as the head of the Atlantis medical department reached her bed.<p>

"Wha' have we got here?" Dr. Carson Beckett asked, light blue eyes darkening with worry as he examined her cut.

"You're Scottish," she said, his accent bringing up some personal memories and making her smile.

"Aye," Dr. Beckett answered, smiling over at her briefly before glancing at the name on her vest. "Buchanan. Ye from the motherland as well?"

"My father was," she said, wincing slightly as he began cleaning her wound. "He passed away a few years ago."

"I'm sorry to hear that, lass. Wha' part of Scotland was he from?" he asked. He finished cleaning, then brought out some more medical instruments to begin sewing up her cut.

"He was born in Inverness." Cami couldn't help but feel at ease around the doctor. She knew that he was making conversation to keep her mind off of getting stitches. Still, there was a genuine interest from him as he kept up the chatter.

"Ah, a highlander," he said. There was a sharp pain as he injected numbing medication around the cut, then a dull pressure when the needle began to pierce her skin.

"Yes, sir."

"No need to call me 'sir', love. Just Carson."

Cami's smile widened, offering her good hand in greeting. "Nice to meet you, Carson. I'm Camila."

He shook her hand. "Camila?"

"Yes, my mother was Brazilian."

"Scottish and Brazilian? Wha' a strange combination."

"Um, thank you...I think."

"Oh! No, I didn't mean - "

Camila let out a laugh. "It's okay, doc, I know what you meant." Her eye caught sight of Sheppard and Anderson entering the infirmary, and the smile immediately left her face. "Tell you what. If I don't get reassigned, I'll take you out to lunch and tell you all about my family."

Beckett looked over at Sheppard, then gave her a reassuring smile. "Deal."

He finished stitching her up, placing a fresh gauze over her cut. She slid off the bed, about to snap a salute when Sheppard waved her off. "At ease, Captain." He held a data pad in his hand; the information on it appeared to be her military record. "How's she doin', doc?"

"She's fine, Sheppard. The cut wasn't too deep, but it did require some stitches. I recommend light duty for a couple of days," Beckett answered.

"Thank you, Carson," Sheppard said, and Beckett took his leave. "Captain Camila S. Buchanan, United States Marine Corps. Member of the First Recon sniping squad. Over a dozen commendations. Recruited as a member of the Atlantis search and rescue team. ATA gene. Wow, clean record." Sheppard rattled off the main highlights of her file, then suddenly looked up at her. "Do you have a problem following orders, Captain?"

_Here we go_, Camila thought, her body stiffening slightly at the question that was thrown at her. Her eyes briefly flicked to Anderson before resting again on Sheppard.

"No, sir," she finally replied. Her body remained rigid, almost defensive.

"But you disobeyed Anderson's order to wait for the rest of the team to assist you." It was a statement, not a question.

She resisted the urge to look away, trying hard to hide the disappointment she was sure was showing in her eyes. Well, if she was going to get demoted or reassigned, she was not going down without a fight.

"Permission to speak freely, sir," she said, ignoring the derisive snort that came from Anderson.

Sheppard frowned, crossing his arms over his chest. "You're not on trial here, Captain. You can say whatever you want."

"We don't leave friends in the hands of the enemy," she stated. She noted a half smile appearing on Sheppard's face. "Yes, I disobeyed Major Anderson's order. Maybe I acted prematurely, and maybe I should have maintained my position. But, at that moment, I felt like you and your crew were in danger." She turned to Anderson. "With all due respect, Major Anderson, but I thought we were a search and rescue team, sir...not just search. I couldn't stand by and watch our fellow comrades almost get killed."

"That's your problem, Captain," Anderson spoke up as he glared at her. "You can't just 'stand by'. You have this...this _need_to do something even when you're told not to. I think your actions speak for themselves. You jeopardized the mission. You could have gotten killed; you could have gotten Colonel Sheppard and his team killed. Did you not think of that? What if there had been more Kinji around, hiding out of your sight?"

Cami could feel her cheeks flushing. She narrowed her eyes at her team leader, biting down on her tongue to keep from saying something she knew she would regret later. He was acting like she was a FNG*. She had served in the marines long enough to know the dangers involved in these search and rescue missions. She didn't regret what she did. In her heart, Cami still felt she had done the right thing.

But, at the same time, Anderson had brought up a good point. She could have gotten them all killed just because of her stupid impulse. Cami had counted only six warriors but more could have been hiding, waiting to ambush the rescue team. She opened her mouth to apologize...to at least say something that would explain her rashness. Anderson seemed to sense her defeat, and he took a step back, a triumphant smile flashing briefly on his face.

"I - "

"She saved our lives," a booming voice cut her off, and Cami turned to see Ronon standing in the doorway. She had the nagging suspicion that he had followed her to the infirmary despite the fact that she had clearly seen him go in the opposite direction.

"That does not justify her actions," Anderson stated emphatically.

Ronan walked into the room moving to stand next to Sheppard. He didn't look at her, but she could feel his eyes on her all the same. The energy that he brought into the room was quite unnerving.

"She took on four of those warriors," Ronon continued, only this time he was just talking to Sheppard. "By herself."

Cami didn't see how that was a big achievement but kept her mouth shut. She had certainly been in tougher situations. Of course, Cami had to admit that this was the first time she had executed a mission without a team backing her up. Besides, she had a feeling Ronon wasn't the kind to go around defending people, and she wasn't about to step in and contradict him.

"I was there, Ronon, I saw that," Sheppard said. He looked back down at her record in his hands, flipping through the images on the data pad without really focusing on anything in particular. "'The last thing you never see', huh?"

"Yes, sir." The mention of her former sniper unit's motto made her stand a little taller.

"I guess it's about time we got a sniper on the team, don't you think, Ronan?"

The muscled man shrugged indifferently despite his earlier assessment about saving their lives. He leaned against the bed opposite her, a bored look on his face.

"Excuse me, sir?" she couldn't help but ask. Wasn't she being reprimanded a second ago? "I-I don't understand - "

"I want you on my team, Captain. That is, if you're as good as it states here on your record."

"Better, sir," she replied, her stiff posture relaxing a bit at the change of events. "I never miss."

"Yeah, that was a helluva shot you took earlier." Sheppard chuckled. He tapped her arm in a friendly gesture. "Great. Glad we got this settled."

"Colonel?" Anderson hissed. "What are you doing?"

"I thought I was being pretty clear when I said, 'I want you on my team', Major," Sheppard said simply.

"But she was reckless. She's clearly a troublemaker." He turned to look at her. "It runs in the family."

So, Anderson had made her connection to Cruz. Cami wondered how he had even come to that conclusion considering she and Cruz looked nothing alike. In fact, they were complete opposites.

Sheppard smiled. "She's hardly the only person to not follow orders before, Anderson. Besides, you obviously don't want her."

There was an awkward silence as that last statement hung in the air. Cami held back a smile, though a hint of it might have touched her lips because she saw Sheppard smirk. She never realized how much a personal vendetta could make her life a living hell until she met Anderson. She made a mental note to ask Cruz what exactly happened between him and Anderson the next time she saw him. Or rather, _if_she ever saw him again.

She shook her head, refusing to go back down that road again. Cami had barely spent one day on Atlanti,s and she was already feeling homesick. Her eyes moved back to Sheppard and Anderson. The latter finally seemed resigned to the fact that she would be leaving his team to join Sheppard's. After what seemed like an eternity, Anderson nodded, offering a stiff salute to Sheppard before walking out of the infirmary.

"What the hell did you do to that guy? He seems to have it out for you." Sheppard spoke up, breaking the silence.

Cami shrugged, her gaze shifting from the doorway where Anderson had just exited to Sheppard's eyes. "I wish I knew, sir."

"Well, you won't have to worry about him anymore."

Cami highly doubted that was the last she would hear of Anderson. While she was extremely happy that she wasn't under his command, she knew he would be popping up eventually. She gave Sheppard a nod and a small smile. Out of the corner of her eye, she noticed Ronon straightening up as if he had done what he was supposed to and was getting ready to leave.

Sheppard looked down at his data tablet again. "Okay, uh, Beckett said light duty so we'll start you off with jumper training for the next few days. Then, we'll move on to weapons which won't take long since I've seen your work first hand. Once your stitches come off, I'll pair you up with Teyla for some hand to hand. We can always play it by ear depending on how your trainings go."

"Sounds good, sir," Cami replied, relaxing a bit more now that Anderson was gone.

"Great! See you tomorrow at 0800 in the jumper bay." He turned to leave with Ronon following. "Oh, and Buchanan?" Sheppard called out over his shoulder.

"Yes, sir?"

"Welcome to Atlantis."


	4. Fly, Yes Land, No

**Once again, thanks to everyone for the reviews, alerts, and favorites! You guys are awesome! :D**

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><p>"Are you comfortable with hand to hand combat?" Teyla asked, making her way to one side of the room where all the melee weapons were hanging.<p>

"Honestly? No," Cami answered sheepishly. "I mean, I can hold my own in a fight but that's about it. As a sniper, I really don't get to see a lot of action up close. The closest I get to hand to hand combat is my finger on the trigger."

"What techniques have you studied?"

"Um, well, in boot camp I went through a mandatory martial arts program. It's a mix of all these different types of martial arts like Taekwondo and Brazilian jui-jitsu." Teyla looked over at her, a confused look on her face. Cami always forgot that Teyla and Ronon weren't from Earth. "Never mind...martial arts is a kind of hand to hand combat."

Teyla nodded, offering her a warm smile. "Perhaps you can teach me this Taekwondo and Brazilian jui-jitsu at our next session."

Cami rubbed the back of her neck. "I don't think I would be the best teacher, but yeah, I can go over some moves with you."

Another nod from Teyla as she took two pairs of sticks from the wall and handed a pair to her. "Are you familiar with Bantos fighting?"

"Nope. No idea what that is."

"It is a fighting style used by my people. You use these rods..." Teyla held up the two sticks, "...to subdue your opponent."

"Okay, sounds easy enough," Cami replied, albeit a bit uncertainly. She had a bad feeling that her ass was going to be handed to her.

They spent the next couple of hours going through the basic poses. After Teyla was sure that Cami had gotten the hang of it, they began to spar. Cami was definitely out of her element. She took a defensive position, countering Teyla as she tried to familiarize herself with the Athosian's moves.

Cami's face and arms were slick with sweat. She twisted and turned continuing to block Teyla from every possible angle. Out of the corner of her eye, she noticed that they had drawn up a crowd, making her even more self conscious. The mainly male gathering didn't help. Low whistles and a few catcalls filled the sparring room. And there, towering above the rest stood Ronon, his green eyes following her every move.

Cami lost focus, and Teyla slammed a rod to the back of her knee forcing her to kneel in pain. Before she even had a chance to react, the other stick made contact with the side of her face sending her tumbling into the mat. A series of "oohs" echoed around the room.

"Fuck," Cami groaned. She ran her tongue along her lower lip as the metallic taste of blood filled her mouth.

"I am sorry," Teyla gasped, throwing the sticks aside and kneeling down next to her. "I assumed you were going to block that last hit."

Cami sat up, wiping the blood from her busted lip. "It's okay. It was my fault." She glanced at Ronon who was making his way out of the room with the rest of the crowd. "I got distracted."

Teyla followed Cami's line of sight and offered her a knowing smile as she helped Cami up. "Perhaps we should continue tomorrow." She moved away gathering the two pairs of Bantos rods to hang back in their place.

Cami nodded, trying hard not to limp as she made her way out of the gym. What she really wanted was to go to her room and take a long, hot shower. Instead, she turned toward the armory.

Her body wasn't the only thing that had taken quite a beating. While Cami wasn't a particularly pretentious person, she _did _pride herself on her military training and accomplishments. Her ego hadn't been too fond of her lack of hand to hand combat skills.

She needed the comforting feel of a cold, metal gun in her hands. Going to the firing range would help her relax. Nothing like popping off a few rounds to melt the stress away. She turned a corner almost running into Sheppard.

"Great, just the person I...whoa, what the hell happened to you?"

"I got my ass kicked," she said with a wry smile.

Sheppard crossed his arms over his chest. "Let me guess...Bantos fighting with Teyla."

"Did the rod-shaped welt on the side of my face give it away?"

"Something like that," he said, eyeing her face with a slight chuckle. "Jesus, kid, I really hope using your face as a punching bag doesn't become a habit."

"I hope so, too, sir," Cami sighed. She'd had such a string a bad luck since she was assigned to Atlantis. Anderson, getting her eyebrow split open, Anderson, getting owned by Teyla.

"Well, you'll be happy to know that we'll be going off-world tomorrow. New planet McKay just discovered."

"I can't wait, sir," Cami replied enthusiastically. Her spirits lifted at the thought of going on her first mission with the SGA-1 team.

"I was actually looking for you because I'm on my way to the mainland. Do you wanna give the jumper another try?"

And just like that her spirits went back down. She had justified her lack of flying skills to the obvious fact that she wasn't a pilot. Still, Cami had always considered herself a quick learner and was a little disappointed that she was still having some trouble flying the jumper.

"Sure," Cami finally replied, though this time a little less earnestly.

"'Atta girl," Sheppard said, clapping her on the shoulder a little too hard so that she stumbled forward a bit. "Go get cleaned up. I'll see you in the jumper bay in 10."

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><p>"Ease up on the gas, kid, we're not having a race here," Sheppard said from the co-pilot's chair.<p>

"Sorry, sir, just got a little excited." Cami pulled back on the control stick, and the jumper slowed down to a cruising speed as they flew over the Lantean mainland. She was still in awe at how the vehicle was piloted by mental interface. Actions were quickly executed with a mere thought. While she was still getting used to flying, the mental interface had certainly made things a lot easier for her.

"That's okay. Go ahead and pull up the HUD. It'll help keep you on a straight path."

The HUD came up, and Cami noticed that she had been flying a little to the right. She let out a frustrated sigh.

"Just relax, take it slow." His hands moved over the controls carefully, almost lovingly. "Think of it as if you're...you know." He gave her a knowing look with a slight wag of his eyebrows.

"Uh...as if I'm what, sir?" Cami gave him a sidelong glance. She kept a curious look on her face, trying hard to keep from smiling. She knew exactly what he had been trying to say but was enjoying his embarrassment.

Sheppard's face grew red. He mumbled something out of the corner of his mouth that sounded like "making love". Behind them, Teyla stifled back a laugh, and Ronon leaned forward in his seat with an amused look on his face.

"Do all men seriously treat their women like they do their vehicles...sir?" Cami asked with a raised eyebrow.

"Only if they really love 'em," Sheppard answered, getting over his embarrassment and throwing her a smile.

Cami rolled her eyes, shaking her head in amusement.

"You might also want to cut down on the 'sirs', kid. It's getting a little annoying."

"Yes, si - um...Sheppard," Cami replied.

The 'sir' was more of a habit than anything. She had actually gotten to know her commanding officer pretty well in the past few days while they had been doing jumper training. Spending hours together inside of a vehicle would do that to you. His nickname for her had started off as a joke seeing as she was the youngest member of the SGA-1 team. But, Cami also saw a kindred spirit in Sheppard.

Cami could relate to his quirky remarks and easygoing personality. She felt she could tease and joke around with him as she would her brothers. Yet, she also carried a respect for him that had more to do with him as a person than his rank.

"Okay, now take this baby down, nice and easy, right over there." He pointed to a flat clearing about half a mile up ahead.

"What?" She almost screamed out her response. She had never landed the jumper before.

The vehicle seemed to sense her trepidation. It swayed a little as her muscles tensed up.

"Making love," Sheppard reminded her, and Cami resisted the urge to reach out and punch his arm.

The jumper hovered over the landing area as Cami tried to ease it down. If she took it down too fast or too steep, she knew she would crash. After about fifteen minutes, she finally managed to execute the landing with only a slight bump.

"Congratulations," Sheppard said, patting her on the shoulder. "I'm 100 years old."

The cargo bay door lowered slowly, and Sheppard and Teyla walked out to go visit the Athosian settlement. Cami remained behind, hoping to better familiarize herself with the jumper controls. She had to admit to feeling a sense of empowerment whenever a console sprang to life at her touch. It was almost like magic.

She traced her fingers over the odd symbols on the DHD console. Cami wondered what exactly the symbols stood for. They looked more like doodles than actual letters or whatever they were. She was vaguely reminded of a mystery novel she had read in which the antagonists had used symbols as their form of communication. She had half a mind to write the symbols down so that she could try to decipher them later in her room.

"So, you're just going to sit here all day?"

Cami silently thanked her years of military training for not jumping a foot in the air at the sound of Ronon's voice. She had been so engrossed in the Ancient symbols that she hadn't noticed he had stayed behind. He stood near the entrance of the jumper, hips cocked to the side as he brought up his arms to stretch. His shirt moved up, and Cami got a quick glance of a well toned lower stomach before she looked away to focus on the DHD again.

"Don't you have anywhere else to be?" she asked, a little annoyed that he had caught her staring in amazement at the jumper dashboard.

"Not really," he answered simply.

"Why'd you come then?"

Ronon shrugged. "I was bored."

"Yes, I can see how watching me fly the jumper for hours on end is incredibly entertaining." She drummed her fingers on the dashboard sensing his eyes on her even though he was looking outside. "Can you please stop that?"

"Stop what?"

"That staring thing that you do. It's a little annoying."

"I'm not staring at you."

"Well maybe not directly, but I can feel it. I'm a sniper. I can sense when someone's staring at me." She rubbed at her arms as if to ward off a chill.

"I was standing in the cargo hold for about five minutes, and you didn't even know I was there."

Huh...so he _had _noticed that his voice had surprised her. She blamed her lack of attention on still getting accustomed to living in a new galaxy. Everything was still so foreign and new to her.

"Whatever," she answered, standing and moving through the jumper to stand outside. She wondered briefly if he really _had_ been staring at her the whole time he was there or if he was just making a point. "I'm just sayin', it's creepy."

Truthfully, Cami was actually very curious at Ronon's incredible observation skills. She knew he was the kind to walk into a room and locate the exits, number of people, and execute an escape plan within the span of a few seconds. But, she also knew he wasn't the kind to willingly talk about himself or his past so she kept her questions to herself.

She made a mental note to ask Carson about Ronon later. Cami had met with the doctor for lunch a couple of times, and she was starting to consider him a really good friend. He had given her a run-down of Atlantis and had been patient and answered the million questions that she had.

She leaned back against the jumper, looking over at the Athosian village. Sheppard and Teyla were walking side by side, huge smiles on their faces. They seemed to be in the middle of an entertaining conversation as they slowly made their way back to the jumper.

"Hey, are Sheppard and Teyla - "

"No." Ronon cut her off before she could finish the sentence.

Cami fixed him with a frown. "You don't even know what I was about to say."

"I do, and they're not."

She turned her gaze back to her two teammates studying their unguarded expressions. Sheppard was gesturing animatedly, probably relaying some sort of amusing, personal story. Teyla's laugh carried from the edge of the village all the way to the jumper. Cami smiled at the candid way they reacted to one another when they thought no one was looking.

"I mean, it's really obvious that they - "

"Yep."

"But they don't realize that - "

"Nope."

Cami ignored the way Ronon kept interrupting her. She was still reveling in Sheppard's and Teyla's clear attraction to one another. Whether they chose to ignore it or just didn't see it was a mystery to her. And Cami loved mysteries.

"We're heading back to Atlantis," Sheppard said once they reached the jumper. "I'll take over the controls when we reach the jumper bay. I'm gonna die of old age if I let Buchanan park the jumper."

"Sure," Cami said, taking her seat in the pilot's chair again. She closed the cargo door and started up the jumper.

"What?" Sheppard asked, looking at the stupid grin that was still plastered on her face.

"Nothing," Cami replied, feigning a look of innocence as she brought up the HUD to make their way back to Atlantis. She was going to have fun with this Sheppard/Teyla thing, whatever it was. "Nothing at all."


	5. I've Got Nothing Better To Do

**Again, thanks for all the reviews, alerts and favorites! I started naming the chapters using quotes from Indiana Jones movies (with the exception of "Welcome to Atlantis", obviously) so just a brief disclaimer to say that the movie quotes are not mine.**

**Also, I don't want to get too detailed describing Cami's background, but every once in a while I'll briefly throw in something about her.**

**Enjoy! :D**

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><p>"You might have a little trouble with it. I have it modified." Cami carefully handed her sniper rifle over to Ronon.<p>

Sheppard had asked them to do a sweep of an apparently abandoned village. So far, they had found nothing but decrepit buildings with crumbling foundations. Whoever had lived there were obviously long gone. McKay had found some sort of control room filled with generators that he was attempting to restore to power. From what Carson had told her about the genius scientist, Cami knew it was only a matter of time before Rodney got those old generators running again. Carson had called Rodney a miracle worker, though he had begged Cami not to repeat that to him. She and Ronon had taken the sweep further out but, other than the Stargate in the distance, the village seemed like the only thing left on the planet.

"See the scope?" Cami continued, scooting closer to him to point to the scope on her sniper. "It's actually a _rifle_scope from a German manufacturer with a reticle that switches from dayscope to nightscope automatically. Crazy, huh?" She looked at him excitedly.

Ronon raised an eyebrow at her as if to say that _she _was the one that was crazy.

"Sorry, I get a little excited when I talk about my weapons."

He gave her a half smile, and Cami suddenly realized how close she was sitting to him. She could practically feel the heat emanating from his body. She felt her cheeks reddening, and she quickly stood, taking a few steps off to the side on the pretense of looking for a target for him.

"How 'bout that large tree about 50 meters away?" she suggested, peering through her binoculars. "It has that huge knot in the middle."

Ronon nodded as he looked through her sniper scope. Cami had been a little uneasy lending him her sniper rifle, but Ronon seemed like man who appreciated a good weapon and so she had let him borrow it so he could take a few shots.

"Don't get discouraged if you don't hit the target. It takes years of training to become a sniper, though I'm proud to admit I'm a natural. My father was a sniper in - "

The shot rang out and, through the binoculars, she saw the bullet pierce the center of the tree knot.

"Holy shit! That was an incredibly lucky shot."

She looked up at him surprised to see him frowning at her. He looked a bit offended at her comment. Cami couldn't deny that it had been a great shot but surely no one was _that_good. She'd never met someone who could just pick up a foreign weapon and hit the target dead center on their first try.

"Pick another target," he said, his voice sounding a little irritated. "Farther."

"Um...okay." She looked through her binoculars again. There was a thicket of dead trees some distance away. One particular tree had a weird looking branch sticking out of it. She pointed to the cluster. "About 200 meters. The long, crooked branch extending from the tallest tree."

He adjusted the gun in his hands and nodded when he found the tree. Cami smiled inwardly. There was no way he was going to get it. The branch itself was a little on the thin side not to mention the fact that it was really far away.

"That's pretty far, so just take your time. Also, there's like a million little factors that go into taking the shot. Wind speed, temperature, distance - "

Again, she was interrupted with the shot. And again, he hit the target straight on. He nailed it right at the crook of the branch so that the top part flew off seamlessly.

"Lucky shot?" he asked, his green eyes daring her to contradict him.

"_Ronon, Buchanan, what's your location?_" Sheppard's voice over the radio stopped her from making any smart comments.

Cami tapped her earpiece. "About half a mile north of the village. Did Dr. McKay get the generators running?"

"_No, but it...-orm com-...Get ba-...-ow._"

Cami turned to Ronon. "Did you catch any of that?" He shook his head, and Cami spoke into her headset again. "Sheppard, can you repeat that? I think we're getting some interference."

"_Buch-...-ou hear m-...there's a...-adio inter-..._"

Ronon tapped her arm and pointed to the sky. A huge, dark storm cloud was rolling in from the south. From the looks of it, it had already arrived at the village. Lightning flashed menacingly across the sky as the wind started to whip around them.

"Come on," Ronon said, shouldering her sniper rifle as they ran back to the village.

A sheet of rain suddenly crashed down on them making it hard to see. Cami and Ronon were drenched within seconds. Cami jumped over a mud puddle and lost her footing when she landed. Her boots lost traction on the slippery ground causing her to skid forward. She fell, her momentum forcing her to slide a few yards along the muddy ground.

"For the love of - you've got to be kidding me!" She was caked in mud.

Before she even had a chance to stand up, Ronon was by her side hauling her up next to him. He grabbed her hand forcing her to continue running. The rain pelted them hard. Cami slipped a couple more times, but Ronon's hand held hers tight, steadying her as they reached the village. Sheppard was at the door to the generator room, a look of relief passing over his face when he saw them.

"I wasn't sure if you could understand what I was saying about the storm," Sheppard said, closing the door behind them.

"Yeah, well the big dark cloud kind of gave it away. That's a hell of a storm out there," Cami replied. She removed her tactical vest and took off her t-shirt, leaving only the tank top underneath. She wiped her face and arms with the shirt and then tossed it to Ronon so he could do the same.

"It caught us by surprise. It's creating some sort of electromagnetic interference so we can't radio out. Looks like we're all stuck here until it passes." Sheppard reached into his vest pocket for a power bar.

"Is it safe here, though?" Cami asked. "All the other buildings in this village are falling apart."

"The room is sturdy," Rodney spoke up from behind his computer tablet. "It was obviously designed to be strong enough to protect the generators."

"Why? What do these generators do?" Cami looked around the room. She counted five machines including the one Rodney was attempting to connect to.

"If you all shut up for two seconds, I can try to figure this out."

"Rodney..." Sheppard warned.

"Just give me a few minutes, okay? I can't concentrate with everyone babbling."

Sheppard shook his head as he finished the last of his power bar. "He's just mad because he still can't get these damn things to run."

"Anything I can do to help?" she asked, walking up to where Rodney was working.

"No, no, I'm fine. You can go kill something...or whatever it is that you do," Rodney replied absentmindedly as he re-hooked his computer tablet to the machine in an attempt to make a connection again.

"I graduated from college, you know. I have a degree in literature."

Rodney looked up at her long enough to throw her a sarcastic smile. "Oooh, literature? Why didn't you say so before? Maybe if you spout off a poem, the generators will turn on."

"Eu pode matá-lo com um dedo," Cami said bitterly. She narrowed her eyes at him, fists balling up at her sides. "Permission to punch Dr. McKay, sir."

"Yeah, yeah," Rodney waved a dismissive arm. "You know, you should get together with Zelenka. He's also really good at threatening me in a different language."

"Play nice, kids. From the sounds of it we're gonna be stuck here for a while, and I don't wanna spend that time hearing you guys arguing."

Outside, the wind continued to howl, and the rain didn't seem like it was letting up anytime soon. The room had also grown dimmer. The storm had clouded any natural lighting that they had. Cami sloshed her way next to Teyla, who was in one corner of the room leaning against one of the generators.

"Do not let him get to you," Teyla said, speaking in a low voice as she placed a comforting hand on Cami's shoulder. "He is like that with everyone."

"Yeah, I'm surprised no one's beaten him up already."

Teyla offered her a smile. "You spoke in a different language. What did you say to him?"

"Portuguese," Cami nodded. "I told him I could kill him with one finger." She rubbed at her arms as a cold breeze seemed to pass through the room. "Hey, is it just me or did it drop like 30 degrees in here?"

Teyla seemed to sense the change in temperature as well. "Yes, I feel it, too."

Across the room, Ronon and Sheppard also perked up. Cami, still drenched in rain water, was starting to shiver slightly as the room grew colder. The three of them followed Sheppard to the door as he opened it to peek outside. The rain had now turned to sleet as the temperature continued to drop.

"Oh boy." They all turned to face Rodney.

"What's wrong?" Sheppard asked. A gust of freezing wind blew inside, and he quickly shut the door.

"I think I know why this place is abandoned." Rodney went back to reading the information from his tablet as they all waited for him to continue.

"I hate it when he does that," Sheppard said after a few seconds of silence. He brought his voice up to get the scientist's attention. "McKay!"

"Huh?" Rodney looked up from his computer screen. "Oh, right. It's the weather," he said simply. He held up his tablet. "See?"

Cami turned on her flashlight and pointed it at the screen. The room had grown considerably darker in the past few minutes. She squinted, trying to make sense of the information on the computer tablet. Rodney pointed to what appeared to be a storm cloud that was taking up half the screen.

"Unpredictable weather patterns. One minute it's nice and sunny and the next there's a blizzard." He punched in some numbers on the screen. "I'm sure the people that lived here tried their best to deal with the weather, but it was probably too much for them, not really knowing when the next storm was going to hit. I think they were attempting to build some sort of shield that would cover the entire village during a storm - that's why they have all these generators. But five generators are not enough to power up a strong field...especially during a storm like this."

"Okay," Sheppard said slowly while they all digested the information. "But why the 'oh boy'?"

"What?" Rodney looked at him confused.

"A little while ago, you said 'oh boy'," Sheppard reminded him.

"Oh, that. Well, unless I figure out how to protect us from this storm, we're all going to freeze to death."

Rodney had said it so casually that it took a while for his words to sink in. Sheppard finally asked what they were all thinking.

"How long do we have?"

"What part of 'unpredictable weather pattern' did you not understand?" Rodney continued to type away at his computer. "Look, I told you it could change from one minute to the next. All I know is that if this storm decides to last for hours, we're all screwed."

Cami was now visibly shivering, and she jumped up and down a few times to keep the blood flowing through her body. "I-It's getting _really_ c-cold, _really_fast, McKay..."

"I understand that, _Captain_, I'm working on it."

"Ronon, Buchanan, take off your clothes," Sheppard said suddenly.

"I usually let a g-guy buy me d-dinner first, sir."

"Ha...funny. But, seriously, take them off. You guys are still soaked from the rain."

Both he and Teyla removed their vests and jackets. Ronon had already taken off his shirt, socks, and boots, remaining only in his pants. Even in the dim lighting, Cami could make out his perfectly sculpted upper body before he put on Sheppard's jacket.

Cami fumbled with her boots. Her fingers felt stiff and frozen making it hard for her to undo the laces. With Teyla's help, she finally managed to shed the rest of her clothing, leaving on only her sports bra and underwear which she quickly covered with Teyla's jacket. She released her long, dark hair from her ponytail. It was still damp, but it covered her ears and neck offering a little more protection from the cold.

Sheppard and Teyla were attempting to help Rodney, holding up flashlights for him and connecting wires to different generators. Cami continued to hop in place, trying to keep her body from shivering uncontrollably. She closed her eyes, letting out a long breath. She was a marine; she was trained to withstand certain temperatures. But the weather on this planet was too extreme.

A sudden rush of warmth engulfed her. She opened her eyes to find Ronon behind her, his arms wrapped around her in a bear hug. Cami didn't bother to think of how inappropriate she looked standing there half naked with Ronon's arms around her. Instead, she turned to face him, her arms circling his waist and offering him whatever body warmth she could. She felt him stiffen slightly as her hands reached under his jacket and started rubbing his bare back. After a while, he relaxed, understanding her attempt to keep him warm as well.

Cami leaned into him, noting the contractions of the muscles in his arms and chest as he, too, massaged her back for warmth. He smelled very masculine...leather mingled with an outdoorsy musk.

"Aha!"

Rodney's cry of triumph made her jump in alarm. The top of her head bumped Ronon's chin, making the Satedan grunt in annoyance.

The lights turned on, and Cami blinked at the sudden brightness. She took a step back from Ronon, her cheeks flushing in embarrassment as she looked away from him. Cami could feel his gaze on her, and she nervously tucked a curtain of hair behind her ear. There was nothing for her to be ashamed of. After all, they were both just trying to keep warm. But she still felt like she had been caught doing something she wasn't supposed to.

"What happened?" she asked, trying to diffuse the sense of awkwardness between her and Ronon.

"Rodney has created a shield over this building to protect us from the storm," Teyla briefly explained.

"I used the failed 'village shield' data that was already stored and recreated it so that it only covers one building. Neat, huh?" Rodney smiled at them. "With the generators up and running, we could probably power this shield for several days...weeks, even."

"Weeks? This storm could last for weeks?" Cami exclaimed.

"I said the _shield_can last for weeks. Who knows how long the storm will last. What am I, a meteorologist?" Rodney shook his head and went back to his computer.

"Well, we're safe for the moment," Sheppard said. "The temperature in here seems to have warmed a bit, though I think you two were warm enough already."

Cami felt her cheeks redden again, and Ronon just shook his head in amusement. Teyla gave Sheppard a look as if to chastise him for bringing that up, though a smile formed at the corner of her mouth.

Cami grabbed her pants and tank top and pulled them on. They were obviously still wet, but the temperature was not a worry anymore. She sat in a corner of the room as she opened up an energy bar and ate half of it.

"How are you feeling?" Teyla asked.

"I'm fine. I have to admit, I thought I was going to lose my fingers and toes from frostbite," Cami joked.

"From what I observed, you were very well protected from the cold," Teyla replied with a knowing smile.

"It was nothing. We were just trying to get warm. You would've done the exact same thing in my situation." _Especially if it had been Sheppard instead of Ronon_, Cami silently added, holding back the stupid grin that always appeared on her face whenever she thought of Sheppard and Teyla together.

She let out a sigh, leaning her head back against the wall and offering Teyla the other half of her energy bar. They sat in comfortable silence, each lost in their own thoughts. The storm continued to rage outside, though it sounded like it was starting to die down a little. There was nothing else to do but wait.


	6. Problem With Her is the Noise

**I know I always say this but, seriously, thanks to everyone for the reviews, alerts and favorites. I really, really appreciate it. :)**

**Just a couple of brief notes. First off, I know the "mandatory Sunday off" policy was implemented right around the episode "Sunday", but I'm going to pretend that this policy was established maybe a couple of months beforehand. Second, the next chapter will take place during the episode "The Ark". I might take a bit longer to update. I'm assuming everyone has seen the episode so I'm writing it to where I'm not repeating everything that's going on.**

**Anyway, that's enough of me talking. Thanks again and enjoy!**

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><p>Cami was just pulling on some shorts and a flowing blouse when the door chime to her room rang. She swiped her hand over it so that the door could open.<p>

"Teyla?" Cami asked curiously.

The Athosian gave her a smile. "May I come in?"

"Yeah, of course." Cami pulled out her desk chair, gesturing for Teyla to sit while she plopped on the bed. "I'm actually on my way to meet Carson. He's taking me fishing on the mainland, but I have a few minutes. Is something wrong?"

"I came to see how you were faring. I can understand how being away from home can be a little…exhilarating."

Cami leaned back against her pillows. She wasn't really good at talking about emotions and whatnot, but Teyla's serenity made her feel at ease.

"I guess so," Cami replied, giving Teyla a shrug. "I started off really homesick the first few days, but I've found that keeping busy helps me forget. Besides, Carson's been really cool. He's helped me adjust to my new life here on Atlantis."

"I see," Teyla replied, though there was something in her tone that implied there was more to her statement.

"Wait! No, no, no. It's nothing like that," Cami said quickly. "Carson and I are just friends. Really. He, uh…he reminds me of home." She looked down at her sheets a little embarrassed.

"Home?" Teyla leaned forward in the chair, a look of genuine interest and concern in her face.

"I'm really close to my family," Cami said, picking at an imaginary piece of lint. "My mom died when I was young, and my dad raised me and my three brothers by himself." She took a deep breath, refusing to break down in nostalgic tears in front of Teyla. "To make a long story short, my dad was Scottish, and Carson reminds me a lot of my family."

"I see," Teyla said again, only this time, it was in understanding.

"Can I…can I tell you something?"

"Of course." Teyla cordially inclined her head.

"Sometimes I feel like I'm a little bit out of my league," Cami admitted, wincing slightly at how weak she sounded. "You kicked my ass in hand to hand, Ronon's a way better shot than I am, Rodney makes me feel like an idiot, and the only reason I'm in Atlantis is because of some stupid gene. It just…it makes me wonder why Sheppard chose me to be on his team in the first place."

Cami was not one to feel sorry for herself, but the past few days had been a bit overwhelming. She felt like the things that she prided in the most had been taken away from her. Her military training and her education were her marks of distinction, and it seemed like they had both been metaphorically torn from her hands.

Teyla stood up and moved to sit on the bed across from Cami. She reached over, squeezing Cami's hand in comfort.

"John knew what he was doing when he chose you to be on the team. I believe that he sees himself in you. He sees your potential, your…greatness, if you will. He would not have chosen you if he did not think you were capable."

Cami was honored at how highly Teyla had just spoken of her. She finally nodded, looking up at Teyla with an appreciative look on her face. However, there was something that Teyla had said that made Cami replay the conversation in her head.

"Wait a minute. I don't mean to ruin the moment, but 'John'?" Cami asked, her fingers forming air quotes. "Are we on a first name basis with the Colonel?"

Teyla's cheeks tinged slightly. "He asked me to call him that. Much like you call Dr. Beckett, Carson," Teyla countered.

"Yeah, but Carson and I are just friends," Cami answered without thinking.

"John and I are friends as well," Teyla replied, a confused look on her face. "I do not understand. Is it wrong of me to call him by his first name?"

"No, of course not. It's just a little personal." Cami shifted uncomfortably, feeling like she had just put her foot in her mouth. She mentally let out a string of curses. Cami always had a tendency to leap before looking. Her impulsiveness always got her into trouble. "You know what, you're right. You and Sheppard are just like me and Carson. Good friends and nothing more. Just forget what I said."

Cami checked her watch, thankful that it was time for her to leave. She stood up, putting on her sandals.

"I'm really sorry, Teyla, but I have to go. I promised Carson I would meet him at 9, and I still need to stop by the mess to pick up some sandwiches."

"It is no problem. Thank you for confiding in me." Teyla paused at the door. "I am honored that you are on our team."

Cami felt a tug at her heart. "The honor is mine." Teyla gave her a kind smile before exiting. A sudden idea formed in Cami's head, and she ran out after her friend. "Teyla, wait."

The Athosian turned around, a questioning look on her face. "Yes?"

"Why don't we meet for dinner tonight? Is 9 o'clock okay?"

"Yes, I will see you then."

_One down, one to go_, Cami thought. She quickly grabbed a blanket from her room, then sprinted down the hallways of Atlantis. She was running short on time, and she wanted to put her plan in action before she left. As she neared the armory, she finally found who she was looking for.

"Sheppard, hey!" Cami called out, then noticed that he wasn't alone. Major Lorne was walking with him. "I mean…_Colonel_ Sheppard, _sir_."

"Wow, Buchanan, who's the lucky guy?"

"What?" Cami asked, confused. He pointed to her casual clothing. "Oh, I'm going fishing with Carson."

"Is that what they're calling it these days?" Sheppard asked with a raised eyebrow, eyeing the blanket in her hands. She saw the hint of amusement sparkling in his eyes.

"As much as I would love to reply with a witty comeback, I'm in too much of a hurry," Cami said, waving a dismissive arm. "Sir, I was actually wondering if you would have dinner with me tonight."

Both of Sheppard's eyebrows shot straight up. It was only when Lorne cleared his throat and shifted to the side to give her and Sheppard room that Cami realized how she had sounded.

"Not like that!" she said quickly, holding up her arms in defense. "As friends. Teyla will be there, too. Mess hall, 2100 hours."

"That's a little late, but sure, kid," he replied. He punched her arm lightly in a teasing gesture. "For a second there, I thought either Ronon or Carson were going to kick my ass. Well, Carson not so much."

Cami barely resisted rolling her eyes at him. Barely. "This is how rumors get started, Colonel. And, for the record, I do _not_ have a boyfriend, nor am I looking for one!" She had to raise her voice a little because Sheppard and Lorne were already walking off. "I'm happily single!"

She heard Sheppard's laugh as he and Lorne rounded a corner. A couple of people that had been passing by gave her some odd looks, but Cami ignored them. It was time to go fishing.

* * *

><p>"Hey, Carson?"<p>

"Yes, love?"

"What's the deal with Ronon?" Cami reeled in her fishing line slowly. So far, they hadn't caught anything, but she wasn't deterred. It was a beautiful, sunny day. The warm ocean water lapped at her thighs, and she was having a great time with Carson.

"Wha' do ye mean?" the doctor asked, his blue eyes even more striking against the ocean.

"What's his story? How did he end up on Atlantis?" Cami kept her voice casual, trying not to show how interested she was in hearing the story.

"I'm no' really sure I'm the person to ask. Have ye tried talking to him?"

"No," Cami admitted. "I figured he's not the kind to go around telling his life story." She reeled in the rest of her line, made sure her the bait was still attached to the hook, then flicked it out back into the ocean.

"Aye, he's no'," Carson replied with a smile. He turned to look at her, his brows furrowed in curiosity. "Is there a reason ye're asking, lass?"

"Just wondering," she replied with an indifferent shrug. She was really glad she was wearing her sunglasses, making it easier to look at Carson with an innocent look on her face. "I kinda put two and two together with Teyla, seeing as how the Athosians have settled here. But Ronon is different. He's the only Satedan on Atlantis. I know there's more to him than he lets on."

After a few seconds of silence, Carson finally conceded. "Very well. Migh' as well take a break. Let's go sit down in the shade."

They impaled their fishing rods in the ground, placing rocks around them to keep them upright. She had unfolded the blanket underneath a shady tree along with their food. They each took a seat, and Carson handed her a sandwich and a bottle of water.

"This is between us. If Ronon knows I'm telling ye this, he'll kick my arse."

Cami held up a hand as if she was taking an oath. "I promise I won't say anything to him." She took a bite of her sandwich, chewing slowly as Carson began to talk.

"I really don't know tha' much about him," Carson confessed. "The Wraith destroyed his planet. He thinks he's the only Satedan left."

"That's so sad," Cami whispered. She put her food down, her appetite suddenly disappearing.

"Aye," Carson agreed. "Ronon was captured by the Wraith and forced to be a Runner. Tha's how we found him. Sheppard rescued him and brough' him to Atlantis."

Cami frowned. "I'm sorry…he was forced to be a what?"

"A Runner," Carson said again. "The Wraith implanted a tracking device in him. Then they released him and hunted him down."

"Oh my gosh." Her hand shot to her mouth as she let out a gasp. "Are you serious?"

"Unfortunately, yes," Carson sighed. "I personally removed Ronon's tracking device."

"Well, that explains why he's so guarded and private." _And such a damn good shot_, Cami thought as she looked out at the ocean. _He had to be in order to survive_. She suddenly regretted asking Carson about Ronon. She felt bad…like she had broken some sort of unspoken confidence. _Look before leaping, Buchanan. Next time you'll learn to keep your mouth shut_.

"Shall we go see if the fish are biting now?" Carson asked, breaking her out of her internal chastising.

She nodded, placing her uneaten food back in the paper bag. "Hey, Carson?"

"Yes, love?"

"Thanks for telling me. I owe you one."

He put an arm around her in a friendly hug as they walked back to their fishing rods. "Help me catch my space trout, and we're even."

* * *

><p>"Teyla! Over here," Cami waved as her friend walked into the mess hall. She watched Teyla grab a tray of food and then walk over to her table.<p>

Cami had stopped by her room for a quick shower and a change of clothes. Her olive-colored skin was slightly red from being in the sun all day, but Carson's prescribed aloe lotion had relieved any discomfort.

She had also managed to grab two candles from her room. They were now lit up, casting small shadows on the table. The table she had chosen was on the deck overlooking the ocean and sitting a little farther from the rest of the mess. She had also purposefully picked 9 o'clock because the mess was usually empty by then.

"Are you not eating tonight?" Teyla asked as she reached the table.

"Uh…no, I, uh…I had a big lunch." Almost as if on cue, her stomach growled traitorously. Cami forced out a laugh. "Maybe I'll grab something in a little while. Please sit down."

Teyla nodded, eyeing the candles as she sat across from Cami.

"It was a little dark over here," Cami hastily explained. "I hope you don't mind, I also invited Sheppard to have dinner with us."

"Of course not," Teyla smiled.

"Great…he should be here any minute – "

"Well, hello there, ladies," Sheppard called out as he walked up with Ronon, both with trays in hand.

Cami almost groaned out loud. It hadn't occurred to her that Sheppard would be inviting Ronon as well. She wracked her mind, trying to come up with a plausible excuse for them to leave. Sheppard had already taken a seat, sitting next to Teyla, but Cami shot up before Ronon had a chance to sit down.

"Wait!" she cried out, grabbing Ronon's arms. Sheppard and Teyla looked up at her in surprise, and Ronon raised an eyebrow at her. "Sorry, I…I just remembered something."

There was a few seconds of awkward silence. Cami stood there stupidly, her hands still wrapped around Ronon's wrists. Sheppard and Teyla were still staring at her expectantly.

"Well, what is it?" Sheppard finally asked.

"I remembered that…I was going to, uh…to show Ronon my combat knives." That last part came out a little too fast, but Cami didn't care. She was making this up as she went along now that the plan had changed.

"You were?"

"Now?"

Both Ronon and Sheppard spoke up at the same time.

"Yes, Ronon, I was. I know how much you appreciate knives, and I wanted to show you my Kukri knives. And, yes, Sheppard, it has to be right now because then I'll get too busy and forget." She left it at that, knowing how silly her excuse sounded.

"If I go look at your knives, will you let go of me?" Ronon asked.

Cami had forgotten that she was still holding on to him and quickly released his wrists. "Yeah, sorry about that."

Cami excused herself and promised that they would have a meal together soon enough. She practically pushed Ronon out of the mess hall.

"I'll meet you in my room," she told Ronon absentmindedly. "I'm just gonna grab a tray."

Ronon gave her an odd look but said nothing. Cami waited for him to disappear down the hall and then she moved behind a pillar. She took a peek around the column and almost smiled in satisfaction when she saw Sheppard and Teyla engaged in conversation.

With the exception of her weird excuse, her plan was working out perfectly. The candles and starry night sky provided the perfect ambiance. The table was also far enough away to where no one would bother them. The few people that were entering the mess hall kept their distance, understanding that Sheppard and Teyla were having a private dinner.

"What are you doing?"

Cami jumped in shock. "Jesus, Ronon, you scared the shit out of me!" She clutched at her racing heart, taking a few quick breaths in an attempt to calm it down. "I bet being a Runner made you perfect your stealth." She cursed under her breath, regretting the words as they escaped her mouth.

Ronon narrowed his eyes at her. She saw them flash angrily. "How did you know I was a Runner?"

_Shit_. "I-It's not like it's a secret, right? I was curious about you, and so I asked around…" She winced at her poor explanation knowing how foolish it sounded.

"You should have asked me."

"I didn't think – "

"No, you didn't." His voice was calm, but it was laced with something more…something lethal.

She walked up to him, her eyes pleading with him to forgive her. "Ronon, please don't be angry with me. I didn't think it would bother you if I knew about your past."

"Next time you're curious, mind your own business."

He stalked away, leaving her standing there and staring dumbly at his retreating back. She closed her eyes, mentally cursing all the stupid things she had said that day. She vowed to think before she said anything next time.

Cami chanced a peek at Sheppard and Teyla again only to see that Rodney had joined their table and the candles had been blown out. She let out an annoyed groan, turning around to make her way back to her room. She took her time, the day's events still playing through her mind until she finally came up with a conclusion.

Ronon was right. She needed to just mind her own business.


	7. Jump Then Fall

**Soooo, I overestimated how much of "The Ark" I was going to use. After re-watching the episode for the millionth time, I figured I only needed to use a bit of it. It's a short chapter, but it felt right to end it there. **

**Once again, thank you for the reviews, alerts and favorites! **

**A quick disclaimer…some of the dialogue in this chapter as well as the overall setting do not belong to me.**

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><p>"Son of a bitch," Cami groaned in pain.<p>

"Buchanan!" Sheppard ran to her side. "Are you okay?"

She sat up and regretted it immediately. Her head felt like it had been split in two. Cami had to close her eyes to fight off a wave of nausea that had rolled through her stomach. She took a deep breath, taking a quick stock of her body. Her fingers and toes moved accordingly, as did her arms and legs. She didn't appear to be hurt too seriously even though the unnatural, painful throbbing of every muscle in her body suggested otherwise.

"I'm up," she finally managed to say. "I'm fucked up, but I'm up…sir."

Sheppard gave her a smile. He helped her up, but a rush of dizziness caught her off guard. She felt herself pitch forward. Ronon stepped in out of nowhere, his left arm deftly circling around her waist to keep her from falling.

"Whoa, there," Sheppard said, also reaching in to grab her. He put one of her arms around his shoulder. "I think you might have a concussion."

Cami murmured her thanks. She held on to them as they helped her to the nearest bulkhead where she half sat, half leaned against the wall. Sheppard ran his fingers through her scalp, and she groaned again as they reached the back of her head.

"Geez, kid. When I said to stop using your face as a punching bag, I meant your overall head as well." He gave her a crooked smile. "It doesn't seem like you cracked your head open, but you do have a huge bump. You must have hit your head when the room was vented. Do you remember what happened?"

Cami frowned, slouching over to rest her forearms on her thighs. "Yeah, that young guy, Herrick…he turned on the shuttle. We were on our way to stop him, but McKay told us to shut the compartment doors. The last thing I remember is being thrown across the room. I blacked out after that. How long was I out?"

"A good while. I was getting a little worried. The shuttle vented the entire space station. Long story short, we're separated from the others because the compartments between us are in vacuum. We're on emergency life support right now."

"Is everyone okay?" she asked worriedly as Sheppard took a seat next to her.

"Jamus is hurt, Rodney and Teyla are okay, and Ronon dislocated his shoulder," Sheppard explained. "We're due for a check-in so Weir should be contacting us soon. How are you feeling?"

"I'm fine." Her body was only slightly sore, and the pain in her head had lessened considerably.

Sheppard suddenly perked up, tapping his earpiece. He mouthed "Weir", then stood up and made his way to the other side of the room.

She looked over at Ronon. He was sitting on the floor, back against the door with his right hand gripping his shirt painfully. She took off her shirt, leaving on her tank top, and started ripping it into a long strip.

"Come here," she told Ronon.

They hadn't spoken since their disagreement outside of the mess hall a couple of days before. Cami hadn't wanted to mess things up further so she had just let him be. She knew an apology was still in order, but for the moment she felt the best thing that she could do was just mind her own business as Ronon had said.

She fastened the fabric into a makeshift sling and stood up, swaying slightly at the sudden movement. Ronon quickly steadied her. His kept his left hand on her hips, his fingers slipping around her belt to help her maintain her balance. She gently placed his arm in the sling, then stood on her toes to reach around his neck. Cami could feel his warm breath on her skin as she tied the fabric into a knot.

She deliberately kept her gaze on the task at hand, fully aware that he was looking down at her. As impossible as it was, she could feel his eyes leaving burning trails from her face all the way down to her neck. Cami swallowed hard. It wasn't that she was uncomfortable at Ronon's intense scrutiny of her features. She was a little surprised to admit that she felt quite the opposite.

"Weir's sending rescue," Sheppard called out, pulling them both from their thoughts. He looked at them reassuringly. "Beckett will be here before you know it."

Ronon took a few steps back as Sheppard obliviously moved between them to take a seat. Cami sat down as well, still unsure of what exactly had passed between her and Ronon. Rodney came on the radio briefly to update everybody on the situation. After that, it got quiet. There was nothing else to do but wait.

Ronon began to pace. He started off slowly at first, a few steps here and there. But then, he started walking the length of the room. Cami grew agitated. The clanging of his heavy boots on the metal walkway grated on her ears. His constant back and forth was making her dizzy again.

"God, Ronon, can you please stop doing that?"

"I'm not good at this," he growled.

"At what?" Sheppard asked, looking up at him.

"Waiting to die."

"Don't think about it," Sheppard said simply.

Ronon's steps became more hurried, almost desperate. "I don't like small spaces."

Cami exchanged a worried look with Sheppard. She was a little nervous at the way Ronon was acting. She didn't know that he was claustrophobic.

Sheppard shrugged. "It could be worse."

"Yeah, we could be out there." Cami jerked a finger to the porthole depicting the view of space.

"Personally, I'd rather die fighting."

"I'd rather not die," their team leader countered.

Ronon continued to pace, his long strides swishing as he continued to march in front of her.

"Sit down," she said, a little too forcefully.

"I can't...I need to _do_something."

Cami stood up abruptly, walking up to Ronon with a determined purpose. He finally stopped pacing, his eyes curious as she neared him. Cami didn't even pause to think about what she was about to do. Her hands reached up, gently but firmly grabbing the sides of his face, then she leaned up and kissed him.

It was a chaste kiss, lasting only the briefest of seconds, but it was enough to make fire burn through her veins. Her light green eyes flicked to Ronon's. Cami saw the same confusion, the same shadow of surprise before the emotions were replaced with a blank veil. She took a step back, raising a hand to her lips. They felt as if lightning had just coursed through them. Her heart was pounding in her chest. Behind her, Sheppard cleared his throat noisily seemingly unaware of just how much the kiss had affected her.

"I was gonna suggest a fight to the death as we burn up in the atmosphere, but your idea looks good, too," he said, breaking the awkward tension in the small room.

Cami went back to her seat. She hunched forward again, resting her elbows on her thighs as she kept her gaze on the floor.

"He was getting on my nerves."

"McKay gets on your nerves and you don't go around kissing _him_."

"Ronon needed a distraction." She let out a small sigh, finally straightening up as she raked a hand through the wisps of hair that had escaped her ponytail. "It was either that or punch him."

It had worked, too...the distraction. Ronon wasn't pacing anymore. Now, he just stood on the other side of the room looking out the window. Cami could see his reflection in the glass. He was frowning.

"I think he would've preferred a punch."

Cami let out another sigh, her eyes once again resting on the floor. She wondered briefly if Ronon had also felt that same fire, that same spark when their lips had touched. After a while, she finally answered Sheppard.

"I would've too."


	8. A Little Impetuous

**Sorry for the late update! This chapter turned out totally different than what I had originally planned so it took me a little longer to write. I apologize for any mistakes…I wanted to upload as soon as I finished.**

**Thanks again for the reviews, alerts and favorites! :D**

**Enjoy!**

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><p>Cami didn't know how long she had been there pacing in front of the door. Fifteen, twenty minutes, maybe? All she knew was that people were starting to give her strange looks, and she had to make a decision soon. She raised her hand, then hesitated and took a step back. It had to be done, there was no doubt about that. Then why was she so nervous?<p>

She took a deep breath. _Just don't think about it and _do_ it_. But that's what gotten her into trouble in the first place. Okay, enough was enough. She was going to do it. Another breath, a step forward, she raised her hand to ring the chime.

"Finally." The door opened to reveal Ronon standing in the doorway. He had his right arm in a proper sling, having already been treated and released by Carson.

"You knew I was out there?"

He nodded, walking over to his bed and making himself comfortable. He leaned back against the wall, bending his left arm behind his head to use as a pillow.

"For how long?" she asked as she followed him into the room.

"Since you got here," he said with a shrug.

"And you just let me stand out there all this time?"

"Yep." The corner of his mouth lifted up in a boyish grin. "You seemed too busy deciding whether you should come in or not." He stretched his legs out in front of him. "Aren't you supposed to be in the infirmary?"

Cami looked around for a place to sit but, other than the bed on the floor, there was nothing. Instead, she leaned awkwardly against the wall. "Carson wanted to keep me overnight for observation, but I convinced him to let me out on the condition that I check in with him every hour. I'm not supposed to go to sleep for the next five hours or so."

She looked around his room. It was filled with various Satedan artifacts. A collection of knives, wooden instruments, and animal pelts were strewn about the room. The two night tables that adorned either side of his bed held candles and books. A large painting hung on the wall above his bed. It depicted three warriors in a triumphant pose.

Cami could feel Ronon's eyes on her, and she resisted the urge to indulge in her curiosity. If he wanted to tell her about himself, he would. That much he had made clear. She let out a small sigh. Minding her own business was harder than she thought.

"Is there a reason you're here?" he finally asked.

"Two reasons, yes," she whispered, wringing her hands nervously.

Cami looked down at her feet as she shifted her weight around from one foot to the other. She had gone over this conversation in her head but actually being in the room with Ronon made her very self conscious. Of course, it didn't help that he kept staring at her waiting for her to elaborate.

"Icametoapologize," she said quickly, the words tumbling out of her mouth.

"What?"

Cami let out a breath and brought her eyes to his. "Look, I'm not good with this emotional crap. I came to tell you I'm sorry. For everything." She moved to stand in front of his bed. "You were right...I should learn to mind my own business. It was wrong of me to be asking about you behind your back when I could have just talked to you myself."

So far so good. One issue down and one more to go. Only she wasn't too keen on bringing up her second reason for visiting him so she stayed on the topic at hand.

"To make it even, you can ask me anything about myself," she added. "Seriously, I'm an open book. Ask me anything you want."

"Anything I need to know, I already do," he said simply.

She felt her cheeks flush at the thought of him asking about her, then frowned. What was she, fifteen? Besides, this wasn't fair. _He_ could ask about her, but _she _couldn't about him? He must've taken her blush as irritation because he rolled his eyes at her.

"I didn't ask anybody about you," he said as if he had read her mind. "Everything I know, I know by looking at you."

Ah, so that's where his observation skills came into play. She knew there had to be a valid, non-creepy reason as to why he was always staring at her.

"Really?" she asked, her eyes challenging him. "Then, please, tell me all about myself."

She plopped herself on his bed opposite him and crossed her arms over her chest. He seemed to be debating whether he should tell her anything at all. After a few minutes, he finally let out an exasperated sigh.

"Fine," he said, straightening up. "You like to hide behind your sense of humor. You hate authority, but you respect it...probably why you joined the marines. You're an amazing shot. You have the potential to be greater than you already are, but you limit yourself. I'd say you're the youngest in your family."

"That's...surprisingly accurate," Cami conceded. "But I actually joined the marines because of my father who, by the way, was the best sniper in the world. And, _technically_, I'm the youngest. My twin brother, Cruz, is older by two minutes. What else have you got?"

He leaned forward, motioning her to get closer as if he was about to tell her a secret. Cami obliged, meeting him halfway so that their faces were about six inches apart.

"Your eyes get lighter when you're happy or surprised and darker when you're annoyed or angry. Every time you smile, a small dimple forms at the corner of your mouth."

His hand moved up, fingers lightly caressing her jaw line. They trailed up, tracing her eyebrows and nose, then moved down to cup her chin.

"Uh-huh..." Cami swallowed, forcing herself to focus on his eyes and not his lips, which were inching closer with every word.

He ran his thumb along her lips. "You bite your bottom lip when you're concentrating really hard on something..." BAM! He smacked a pillow to the side of her face. "And you get distracted really easily."

"Ow! Concussion, remember? Geez!" She threw the pillow back playfully as they each sat back to their respective places. "That's not fair! Besides, it's not like I'm ever going to have a randomly attractive guy seducing me on the battlefield to distract me." There she went again, being impetuous again. "N-not that _you're_ attractive. I mean, you are but not in _that_ way. You're a _friendly_ kind of attractive. As in, 'hey, girls, this is my hot friend, Ronon...have at 'im'. And I also mean 'hot' in a friendly way. Because that's what we are..._friends_..."

He ignored her ramblings. "You'd be surprised. The Pegasus Galaxy is strange that way."

"The Pegasus Galaxy is making _me _strange," she muttered.

"You also smell...nice." He said it like it was a bad thing. Cami didn't know whether to take it as a compliment.

"It's called soap. You should try it sometime," she replied dryly.

"It attracts enemies," he countered.

"Now you're lecturing me on how to do my job? I always stay downwind. I may look young, but I'm not naive. You need to - "

"_Cami...you still alive, love?_"

Cami jumped at Carson's voice. She had forgotten that she was supposed to check in with him. She tapped her earpiece.

"Yep, still alive and kicking," she answered.

"_If you miss your next check-in, I'll personally drag you back to the infirmary myself_."

Cami groaned, about to grumble a "yes, sir" when Ronon tapped his own earpiece.

"She's with me, doc," he said gruffly.

"_Ah, Ronon, good_. _You'll make sure she's safe. Keep an eye on her, son. Let me know if she starts acting strange."_

"You mean more than usual?" Ronon asked innocently, making Cami throw him a look showing that she was not amused. "I'll take care of her, doc. Don't worry."

"_Great! I'll check back in a couple of hours_."

"So, now I'm supposed to spend the next two hours with you?"

"Seems like it." He stretched out his legs on the bed again.

"And do what?"

"Spar?" he suggested.

She rubbed her cheek remembering her last sparring session with Teyla. Cami thought she could still feel the welt from the Bantos rod striking her face.

"Nah, I really don't feel like getting my ass kicked again. I've had enough of that to last me a lifetime. Besides, Carson said no physical activity for at least a day."

Her eyes roved over his room again. She noted the books on his nightstand. As an avid reader, she was especially interested in his reading materials. Cami made a mental note to bring by some of her books to see if he was interested in Earth literature.

"What was the second reason you came to visit?" he asked, pulling her from her thoughts.

"Huh?"

"You said you came for two reasons. The first was to apologize. What was the second one?"

Cami let out a forced laugh. "Oh, that. It's nothing."

He narrowed his eyes at her. "Nothing? You came all the way over here to tell me nothing."

"It's not like you live all the way across the other side of Atlantis. You're just a deck below me."

"Your eyes shift down when you're lying, you know."

"Wow, your keen sense of perception was amusing at first but now it's getting a little annoying. I bet I can tell you stuff about yourself just by looking at you, too."

"I know you're deliberately changing the subject, but I'll let it go for now. I'm actually interested in hearing what you _think _you know about me."

Cami cocked her head to the side and studied him. Her eyes trailed from his boots to his face. He had his eyebrows raised, green eyes shining in amusement as he waited to hear her observations. After a few minutes, she finally nodded and leaned forward.

"You're a warrior, not just physically but metaphorically as well. There's just this aura about you that screams strength and raw power. But there's another side to you as well. You treasure your friendships and have this incredible will to defend your friends at whatever cost...even if it means your death."

"True," he acknowledged. He scooted closer to her until they were almost face to face again. "But all of that is obvious. Look harder."

She searched his eyes. He seemed troubled. A shadow of something - Cami couldn't tell what - ghosted over his eyes.

"You have this anger inside of you," she whispered, frowning. "Something you can't let go." She let her hand fall over his. "What are you afraid of?"

She could feel him tense up. His hand fisted underneath hers, and she squeezed it in comfort. His eyes were unflinching. They continued to stare into hers with such a heated intensity. The room was deadly quiet except for the sound of their own breathing.

He shifted, slowly closing the gap between them. His breath stroked her face. Her heart pounded in her chest so hard she was sure Ronon could hear it. Cami suddenly couldn't breathe. Her gaze automatically moved to his lips.

"_Ronon_." Sheppard's voice rang through Ronon's earpiece making them both jolt back.

"What?" Ronon growled, getting to his feet angrily.

Though, angry because they had been interrupted or because of what had been about to happen, Cami didn't know. She sat on the bed trying to control her breathing.

"_You up for some sparring, buddy? I know your arm's in a sling, but when has that ever stopped you before, right? I'm heading over to the gym right now_."

"I'll meet you there," Ronon answered.

Cami stood up, her mind still a little fuzzy and confused. Had Ronon just been about to kiss her? She felt an attraction to him, sure, but did he actually feel the same way?

She shook her head. No, this was a mistake. Nothing should be happening between them. She had to make sure of that.

"You comin'?" Ronon asked. He was waiting for her at the door.

"No...you go ahead."

"I told Beckett I would stay with you."

"I'll be fine," she assured him forcing a smile on her face.

He walked back into the room to stand in front of her. "You never told me your second reason for coming."

"I..." She hesitated, feeling self conscious again. "I came to tell you that the kiss, back on the moon...that meant nothing. I didn't want to make things weird between us. I was trying to distract you from the situation just like you were proving your point by distracting me right now." She forced herself to hold his gaze. "It was nothing...right?" she asked more for herself than for him, but she still waited for his answer.

Another shadow passed over his eyes, a look of uncertainty, before a blink revealed nothing more. He nodded slowly, his gaze shifting down as he took a step back.

"Yeah…it was nothing."


	9. It's a Trap

**As always, thanks for the wonderful reviews, alerts and favorites!**

**There's a point to this chapter, I swear. ;)**

**Enjoy!**

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><p>"It looks like some sort of breakroom, maybe?" Cami whispered into her radio headset even though she was no where near any danger.<p>

Lorne and his team had been captured by a rogue group of Genii and were being held in some type of warehouse. Cami had been ordered to be Sheppard's eyes as he, Teyla, and Ronon scouted the warehouse. But the building's boarded up windows and the overall thick, jungle-like scenery offered a very limited line of sight.

"There's tables, chairs, some sort of storage unit, I think..."

"I can admire the decoration later," Sheppard quipped. "What about men?"

Cami adjusted her scope, but it was no use, really. Short of having x-ray vision, with the boards in place and the trees in the way, there was no sure way of knowing exactly how many men were in there.

"I'm sorry," she sighed. "I don't have a visual. I can only zoom in so much on those cracks between the boards. Wait a minute..." She swept over the rest of the warehouse focusing on one of the larger windows. A few shadows could be seen, but whether friend or foe, she couldn't tell. "Sheppard, check out the large window on the far east side. I see shadows, but I can't get a correct count."

"Got it," he confirmed. There was a moment of silence in which Cami assumed he was coming up with a plan. "Buchanan, meet us at the west entrance. Looks like we're going to have to go in there blind."

Cami shouldered her sniper rifle, double timing it to the warehouse. She met up with Rodney and Carson who had been waiting nearby for Sheppard's all clear. It seemed that they were all going to be there to attempt the break-in since they didn't really know the condition of the SGA-2 team. Sheppard opened the door as soon as he saw them approaching. He took them into a room off to the side - the one she had described as a breakroom, his voice low as he explained the situation.

"Okay, I don't know what those Genii soldiers are planning, but it's pretty clear that they wanted to lead us here. Now, the only way in or out of that east room is through an outer door. The door inside this building is blocked by some heavy debris."

"Why would they block themselves in like that? It's crazy," Rodney supplied.

"They're clearly not very smart," Cami said. "I mean, look how much noise we're making and they haven't sent anyone out to investigate."

"That room is the key," Sheppard said. "They deliberately locked themselves in there with the only means of escape being that other door."

Cami snapped her fingers thinking of the thick brush that surrounded the warehouse. "Of course. The only way to get to Lorne and his men would be through that door meaning - "

"That that's they're only line of sight - exactly!" Sheppard finished.

Carson and Rodney still looked lost at their vague explanation.

"That's the only way in," Cami said again. "They're expecting us to just walk right up to the door."

Teyla and Ronon suddenly appeared and confirmed their suspicions.

"The trail that leads to that door is surrounded by thick trees," Teyla explained. "There are two windows on either side of the door, both barred by boards, but it is quite obvious that they are looking and waiting."

"They're just gonna snipe everyone that walks up that trail?" Rodney asked, his voice raising slightly.

"Looks like it," Sheppard sighed. He ran a hand through his unruly hair looking around the room as if for inspiration.

Cami walked quietly around the corner, her pistol poised and ready. She saw the door Sheppard had mentioned. It was blocked by some machinery, probably leftover from whatever that warehouse used to be. C-4 was out of the question because they didn't know where exactly Lorne and his men were being held. They couldn't risk injuring their people. Her eyes followed the length of the hallway and almost gasped in surprise at the obvious. She practically ran back to Sheppard.

"Sir, the vents," she said excitedly. They all looked up and saw the large metal grate jutting from the wall. "They're industrial sized to ventilate a whole warehouse. I bet they're big enough for a person to fit through."

"Ha ha! Buchanan, you're a genius!" Sheppard clapped her on the shoulder. "Ronon, give her a boost up."

Cami's excited smile was replaced with a confused frown. "Wait, what?"

"Well, you came up with the idea, it's only right for you to see it through. Knock yourself out, kid." The corner of Sheppard's lips twisted up into a smile.

"I just practically volunteered for that one, didn't I? What about Teyla? She's smaller than me." Cami was a good four inches taller than the Athosian.

"Yeah, but you're less...curvier."

Ah, so Sheppard had noticed Teyla's curves. That statement in itself had just made Cami's day...then she remembered that she had made a promise to herself to stop meddling in their business.

"I resent that," Cami said, narrowing her eyes at him, though she had already began removing her sniper rifle, pistol holster and ammo vest. "There happens to be muscle underneath my - "

"Just get in the damn vent..._bones_."

Cami placed her foot in Ronon's waiting hands, and he easily lifted her up as if she was made of air. She used a small pocket knife to pry open the vent and then peered inside. Dust and creepy cobwebs lined the inside of the shaft. She really hoped that the spiders, or whatever alien creature had made those sticky meshes, weren't poisonous.

"Should be about 20 meters straight ahead. Try to create some sort of distraction. You need to keep them away from the windows," Sheppard said, handing her a pistol.

Cami nodded as Ronon lifted her up higher so that she could climb into the vent. She pushed off him, planting her hands on the lips of the vent interior to raise herself inside. Behind her, Ronon put his hand on her butt, shoving her upwards so that the rest of her body could fit into the vent.

"You grab my ass one more time, and I'll cut your balls off in your sleep," she whispered fiercely.

"You can try," he replied, and she heard faint laughter from the rest of the team.

It was a tight fit inside the vent. She had to drag herself forward using her forearms, stomach and thighs. Well, at least that outdoor obstacle course in boot camp served for something. Cami went in slowly, unsure of how much weight the shaft could take. From the looks of it, the warehouse had probably been abandoned for years, maybe even decades.

Cami wondered if Sheppard, Teyla and Ronon were already in position. She still had no idea what she was going to do as a distraction. Maybe pop off a few rounds and pray that her team would breach the door before the Genii had a chance to shoot at her? She could only hope.

She passed another grate, taking a quick peek and noticing that she was just outside the room. She could see the barred door right underneath her. Just a couple more meters...

"Aagghhh!"

The shaft suddenly gave way, crashing down with a deafening noise. Cami somersaulted forward, landing on the floor of the east room with a painful thud. As the dust settled, she found herself at the business end of five rifles. She held her hands up, pistol clattering to the ground as she released it from her fingers.

"Um...hi?" she said weakly.

Just then, Sheppard, Teyla and Ronon burst through the door. After two elements of surprise, the Genii soldiers were no match for the SGA Alpha team. The room was cleared within seconds.

"That was a helluva distraction," Sheppard noted, his boot nudging the debris.

"Yeah, nice of me to _drop _in, huh?" Cami replied as Teyla helped her up.

Sheppard raised an eyebrow at her. "I can't believe you just said that."

"What? It was funny!"

"I though' it was funny," Carson piped in, offering Cami a smile.

"Let's just leave the one liners to me, okay?" Sheppard replied as he, Rodney and Ronon searched the rest of the room.

Lorne and his team were all sitting at the far corner of the room. Cami reached Lorne first, untying him from his restraints and removing the gag that had been placed over his mouth.

"Are you an angel?" Lorne asked, blue eyes widened in surprise.

"Sir?" Cami glanced behind her not sure if he was talking to her.

"An angel," he repeated. "You came from above."

Cami didn't know what the hell he was talking about. "Major Lorne, are you okay?"

She looked around. The other marines had been knocked out but were slowly coming to with the help of Carson. Lorne was the only one still lucid, so to speak.

"What does this look like to you?" Sheppard said to no one in particular. He was standing over a table filled with weapons. He held up a spear.

"Kinji," Ronon growled.

"They're here?" Cami asked. She recalled her first mission as soon as she had arrived on Atlantis - the mission that had put her on Sheppard's team. The Kinji warriors...and their poisoned spear heads.

"I'm not reading any other life signs but us," Rodney spoke up, studying the life sign detector in his hand.

"The Genii probably paid them a visit," Sheppard concluded. "Bastards wouldn't trade with us, but they give the Genii their weapons in a heartbeat."

"They...poisoned him," one of Lorne's soldiers managed to say. Teyla helped him sit up.

"What happened, Stark?" Sheppard asked, making his way over to the soldier and kneeling down next to him.

"They wanted _you_, sir," Stark replied, now with a little more strength. "Thought that if they captured us, you would lead the rescue. I think they're outcasts who are trying to get back into the good graces of their people."

Sheppard shook his head, muttering a curse under his breath.

"After a couple of hours, they grew restless," Stark continued. "They grabbed Major Lorne and cut his neck with one of the poisoned spear heads to prove how serious they were. Don't know what happened after that. They knocked us out.

Carson immediately set about inspecting Lorne's neck. Cami's eyes darted back to the weapon-filled table. She stepped away to take a closer look when Lorne grabbed her hand.

"Wait!" he cried out, shoving Carson aside. "Don't leave...please."

Cami shot Carson a worried look. "What's wrong with him?"

"I don't know, love, but the sooner we leave, the better. The poison is causing him to hallucinate, and I'm afraid I won't get any answers until we get him to the infirmary," Carson replied gravely as he stood, dusting himself off.

"Agreed," Sheppard said. "Rodney, Teyla and I will stay behind...see what else we can find out about the Genii's plan. Ronon, help Beckett get Lorne's team back to Atlantis. And Buchanan..." Sheppard glanced at Lorne who was still holding on tightly to Cami's hand. "Lorne's all yours."

Cami nodded. She hoisted Lorne up, circling her arm around his waist to help steady him. Other than the cut on his neck, he looked to be uninjured, but the poison seemed to have hindered his motor skills. The walk back to the jumper was slow as Lorne wouldn't allow anyone but Cami to help him. She had half a mind to just carry the major fireman-style back to the jumper, but there were a few moments where Lorne would seem to revert to his old self and walk on his own. Ronon had tried stepping in only to have Lorne almost pull his gun out on him. She had to calm the major down with the promise that only she would remain by his side.

Once they reached the jumper, it was ultimately decided that Carson would drive. Cami remained in the cargo hold next to Major Lorne who wouldn't stop staring at her. The longer they took, the more Lorne would lose sense of reality. One second he would be talking about his family and the next he would give orders to his team as if they were still out on the field. Cami tried her best to calm him down as he wouldn't respond to anyone else.

"Your eyes have gold flecks in them," Lorne said quietly. "Did you know that?"

Cami shifted uncomfortably. He had been paying her compliments left and right. The situation would have been hilarious if it wasn't so serious. She was worried for Major Lorne. He seemed to be slowly losing his mind.

"Major Lorne..."

"It's Evan," he interrupted, reaching out to tuck a wisp of hair behind her ear.

Cami jerked back at his touch, grabbing his hand and pulling it down forcefully. He was like a little kid that wouldn't settle down. Her eyes met Ronon's briefly, and the Satedan smirked, shaking his head in amusement.

"Major Lorne, please settle down. You're not being yourself," she managed to say as she attempted to release her hand from his.

"Evan," he said again. "And I can't settle down when I'm with someone as beautiful as you."

"You're kidding me, right?" She rolled her eyes at his line. Lorne reminded her of her brother, Cruz, and the cheesy lines he would use on women.

"I'm serious," Lorne said, looking a little hurt.

Suddenly, he lunged at her. His lips briefly brushed against hers as they both tumbled to the floor. Before Cami had a chance to fully react, Ronon stepped in. He grabbed Lorne by the neck of his vest and flung him back into his seat in one swift move. With a low roar, the major swung at Ronon in anger, but the Satedan skillfully blocked the punch and pulled out his weapon.

"Ronon, no!" Cami cried out. She quickly stood, placing herself between Ronon and Lorne. She held her hands up, chest heaving as she tried to diffuse the situation. "We can't knock him out. We don't know if he'll ever wake up."

Behind her, Lorne made another attempt to stand, but Stark and another soldier held him down. A storm brewed in Ronon's eyes as they continued to stare at each other. After a few tense seconds, Ronon finally put his weapon away.

"We're at the Stargate," Carson called out, breaking the tension a little.

Ronon gave her one last look before going back to his seat. Cami remained standing. She turned back to Lorne.

"Don't do that again," she said forcefully.

Lorne stopped struggling against his soldiers and nodded. Cami ran a hand through her hair, looking out the jumper's view port. The Stargate never looked so welcoming.

* * *

><p>"How's he doing?" Cami asked Carson as she reached his desk in the infirmary.<p>

"Great, actually," Carson replied enthusiastically. "He's being released today."

"That's good," Cami smiled, leaning against Carson's desk. She had been sporadically visiting the infirmary the past couple of days to check up on Lorne. "Oh! Carson, before I forget. I'm gonna have Cruz send me some haggis and a bottle of Scotch whisky. Maybe we can convince one of the cooks to mash up some turnips and potatoes."

Carson let out a gasp of surprise. "My mum used to make haggis all the time! It'll definitely bring up some memories."

"Good ones, I hope."

"Of course," Carson answered her with a warm smile. "I'm looking forward to it."

"Me too! We should make a night of it. Maybe I can tell Cruz to send two bottles..."

"Sorry to interrupt," Major Lorne walked into the room, making Cami stand at attention. He waved her off. "Am I free to go, doc?"

"Aye," Carson answered. "But I need ye to come back tomorrow for a check-up. We have to make sure tha' - "

"Hey, guys." Sheppard and Ronon entered the infirmary, their faces bloodied and bruised.

"Wha' happened?" Carson exclaimed as he reached for a medkit.

"Why don't you ask Terminator over here? Ronon's been venting out a lot of aggression lately," Sheppard vaguely explained.

Carson led them to a couple of beds off to the side, leaving Cami and Lorne alone. Cami cleared her throat, pushing off the desk to leave.

"I'm glad you're okay, Major. I'll just, uh...I'm gonna go..."

"Wait, Captain," Lorne stopped her as she walked past him. "Dr. Beckett told me what happened." He looked at her nervously. "I apologize for anything I did or said that made you uncomfortable while I was hallucinating."

"Don't worry about it," she assured him. "I know you weren't being yourself, sir"

"Still...I'm sorry I fixated on you. I never should have put you in that position - "

"Major Lorne, it's okay. My priority was your safety no matter what happened. I'm sure you would have done the same in my place. We soldiers stick together, right?" She offered him a reassuring smile which he returned gratefully.

He turned to leave, took few steps, then turned back.

"This might be out of line but...would you like to have dinner with me?"

"I..."

She didn't know what to say. Cami stood there stupidly for a few seconds as she thought about his question. Her eyes glanced past him to where Ronon was sitting on a bed waiting while Carson attended to Sheppard. Ronon was playing with a combat knife, flipping it in his hand with a bored look on his face. He turned to look at her, frowning in concern when he noticed she was talking to Lorne.

Cami let out a sigh, finally coming up with an answer. "I'm sorry, Major, but I don't think - "

"I understand," Lorne replied, then stuck out his hand. "Friends?"

"Of course," she answered, gripping his hand in a firm shake. "And, please, call me Cami."

"Evan," he answered.

Cami thought back to the jumper and his insistence on calling him by his name. She smiled. "I know."


	10. Sunday

**I know I always say this, but, seriously, thank you for the reviews, alerts, and favorites. :)**

**This chapter will take place during the episode "Sunday". I have to say that this is both my favorite and least favorite episode. I like seeing the crew enjoying themselves on their day off, but I hate what happens at the end. I love Carson so much, and I cry every single time I watch it. In an effort to keep the rehashing to a minimum, I just focused on some key points in the episode while adding Cami in there.**

**I've added the lyrics to the first verse of The Minstrel Boy. It's an Irish song, but the meaning transcends everything. If anyone is interested in hearing this verse, I definitely recommend Colm Meaney's version in the Star Trek: The Next Generation episode "The Wounded". You can search YouTube under "Minstrel Boy by O'Brien". His rendition of this song really tugs at your heart.**

**Disclaimer: Some of the dialogue in this chapter does not belong to me.**

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><p><em><strong>The Minstrel Boy to the war is gone<strong>_

_**In the ranks of death you will find him;**_

_**His father's sword he hath girded on,**_

_**And his wild harp slung behind him;**_

"_**Land of Song!" said the warrior bard,**_

_**"Tho' all the world betrays thee,**_

_**One sword, at least, thy rights shall guard,**_

_**One faithful harp shall praise thee!"**_

_**~ The Minstrel Boy by Thomas Moore~**_

It was a beautiful Sunday. The sun was bright and cheery, and Cami couldn't have been in a better mood. She hummed along to herself as she walked down the halls of Atlantis. She had just turned a corner when she saw Sheppard talking to Teyla and Ronon…and her team leader held a golf club in his hand. She promptly turned around and started walking back from where she came.

"Buchanan!" Sheppard called out.

"Crap," she muttered. She couldn't very well pretend she hadn't heard him. The people two decks away probably heard him yell out her name. She plastered an innocent smile on her face as she turned back. "Oh, hey, Sheppard. I didn't see you guys there."

Ronon rolled his eyes behind Sheppard, shaking his head to show he didn't believe her.

"Would you like to join us for a golf lesson? And don't say you have mission reports to file," Sheppard quickly said when she opened her mouth to reply. "You always turn in your reports on time."

"Actually, I got invited to play volleyball," Cami answered with a shrug.

"Seriously?"

"Is that so hard to believe?" she asked Sheppard with a raised eyebrow.

"No, it's just…other than us and Carson, I've never really seen you hang out with anyone else…"

"Somehow word got out that I played in college and some of the marines invited me for an impromptu game. Haven't played in ages but it should be fun." She gave Sheppard a friendly tap on the arm as she walked away. "Besides, I think golf is boring."

"At least you're honest." Sheppard threw Teyla a playful frown.

"Have fun!" Cami said over her shoulder. She caught Ronon's glare, and she smirked at him.

She resumed her humming, her mood lightening even more now that she had gotten out of playing golf with Sheppard. Football she could get into, but golf? She shook her head to herself; it just wasn't her thing.

"Cami!"

She turned to find Carson approaching her.

"Hey," she smiled at him. "What's up?"

"I came to see if you wanted to go fishing with me and Rodney."

"Wow, I feel so popular today," Cami laughed. "Sheppard just asked me if I wanted a golf lesson." She gave him an apologetic look. "You should've told me sooner. I'm on my way to go play volleyball right now. I'm sorry."

"No worries, love." He squeezed her arm to show that there were no hard feelings.

"Wait, Carson. I can always cancel. Just give me a few minutes. I'll go tell them I can't – "

"No, no," he interrupted her. "You already have your plans. We can always go fishing another day. Maybe next week?"

She gave him a quick hug before she set off again. "Definitely."

* * *

><p><em>I should've gone fishing with Carson<em>, Cami grumbled to herself as the volleyball game came to a halt following an injury. Having made no other plans she was at a loss at what to do for the rest of the day. She finally decided to grab a sandwich and then head over to the east pier with a book. She was on her way to the mess hall when she noticed Sheppard and Ronon leaving one of the gyms.

"Hey!" She jogged to catch up to them. "I thought you guys were playing golf."

"Change of plans," Sheppard replied. "I thought you were playing volleyball."

"Change of plans," Cami sighed. "You guys wanna grab some lunch?"

"We're headed over to my room for some beer and snacks. You're welcome to join us…that is, if you don't think it's boring."

"You had me at beer," she said and followed them to Sheppard's room.

"So, Buchanan, how are you liking Atlantis so far?" Sheppard asked once they had settled in his room.

"It took some getting used to," she admitted with a shrug. "But I think I'm getting the hang of it."

"Yeah, Atlantis does that to you. You getting along with everyone? No problems?"

"Um…no, no problems. I mean, other than Anderson when I first arrived and McKay back on that weird weather planet, I think everyone's been pretty awesome."

"That's good to hear," Sheppard replied as he flipped through the magazine he was reading. "Hey, Ronon, how long have you been here already? A year?"

"Year and a half."

"Year and a half? You ever hang out with anyone else besides me and Teyla? I'm not saying we're sick of you or anything. Are you, by any chance, dating anyone?"

Cami narrowed her eyes at Sheppard. She had a feeling that he was getting at something. She grabbed her beer mug and leaned back in her seat, curious as to how this conversation would go.

"You mean, like a woman?" Ronon asked.

Sheppard shrugged. "Or a man."

"No, I'm not ready yet."

Ronon had said it so nonchalantly that it took a few seconds for the response to register in Cami's head. Her brows furrowed as she tried to figure out what he meant by that. It had never occurred to her that Ronon might have a significant other.

"Not ready yet?" Sheppard put his magazine down. He clearly hadn't been expecting that sort of response. "Did you leave somebody behind on Sateda?"

Ronon nodded but said nothing.

"Wife?" Sheppard asked with an innocent look on his face.

Cami held her breath. Ronon was not one to talk about his personal life, and she was dying to know details. After a few seconds, he finally replied.

"Close enough."

An awkward silence fell between them. Cami glanced at Ronon over her beer mug. She had never pictured him as a family man. The idea of him with a child in each hand instead of weapons was a bit silly. Though, now that she properly though about it, the idea started to gain some merit. She could definitely see him with three, maybe four little boys all clambering for his attention. He would take them out to the woods, patiently teaching them how to track, wooden swords and plastic guns in their tiny hands...

Sheppard cleared his throat, and she realized she had been staring at Ronon with her mouth slightly open. She quickly sat up, taking a long drink of her beer and hoping they hadn't noticed her daydreaming.

"What about you, Buchanan?"

"What about me?" Her eyes flicked to Sheppard's with a slight frown.

"Got anyone waiting for you back on Earth?"

She scoffed. "You're kidding me, right?"

"Oh, come on! You must have had _somebody _back home that was special to you."

"With three brothers and an overprotective, Scottish father, guys were lucky to even make it past the sidewalk in front of my house," she replied with a roll of her eyes. "As I got older, school became my priority and then the marines." Cami shook her head. "I didn't have time to even _think _about being in a relationship."

"Uh-huh...okay, well, what about here? On Atlantis?"

_And _there it was. She knew there had to be a reason for Sheppard to be randomly asking about hers and Ronon's dating lives. She wondered if Sheppard knew she had tried to set him up with Teyla and this was his way of getting back at her.

"What are you getting at, Sheppard?" she asked, cupping the mug of beer in her hands as she took a sip.

Sheppard shrugged, feigning great interest in his magazine once again. "Nothing, I just figured you're single...Ronon's single..."

She inhaled sharply, causing her to choke on the beer. Her eyes watered as she coughed loudly. "There's nothing going on between me and Ronon," she quickly pointed out between coughs.

Sheppard raised an eyebrow at her. "I never said there was."

Cami narrowed her eyes at him again. "You know what I mean. Ronon and I are just friends."

"Riiiight. I practically had to shield my eyes at the sparks that flew when you two kissed back on that moon."

Cami could feel the heat rushing to her cheeks. She glared at Ronon to help her out, but he remained silent. His green eyes lightened in amusement. The bastard seemed to be enjoying her discomfort.

"T-that was nothing. Ronon, please tell Sheppard that - "

"What about you and Teyla?" Ronon finally spoke up turning to Sheppard.

"Yes, thank you! Finally someone says something!" Cami exclaimed.

Sheppard frowned at them. "Me and Teyla…really?"

"It's so obvious that you guys like each other," she said, grateful for the change in subject.

"What are we, in grade school?"

"I'm just sayin', you need to ask her out before it's too late."

"Too late for what?"

"For - "

But whatever Cami had been about to say was drowned out by the sound of a loud explosion. They all jumped to their feet, running out the door as the klaxons began to blare. The transporters were out, and they immediately set about running around the million flights of stairs and hallways that led to the mess hall.

"Carson?" She was surprised to find him standing there amidst all the chaos. She had already pictured him on the mainland with a few prize-winning space trouts to his name.

"What the hell happened?" Ronon growled behind her.

"Some sor' of an explosion," Carson hastily explained. "At least three dead. A dozen or so severely injured..."

One of the medics walked by with a stretcher, interrupting Carson. Cami gasped when she saw Teyla lying there with a piece of shrapnel protruding from her abdomen.

"Teyla!" Sheppard immediately pushed past them. He looked down at her, the worry evident on his face.

"John," Teyla faintly whispered, reaching out for his hand.

Cami took a step back, feeling like she was intruding on a private moment. She bumped into Ronon who put his hand on her shoulder. Her hand automatically moved to his, and he squeezed it gently in reassurance.

Cami's gaze followed Carson. He offered her a grim smile before leading the way to the infirmary. She let out a breath she hadn't realized she had been holding. Carson would make it okay. He always made everything okay.

* * *

><p>"Carson, the man you are working on right now has been infected with an explosive tumor," Rodney explained. "We think it's what killed Hewston and caused the explosion."<p>

"Wha' are you talking about? That's no'..."

"It _is _possible, Carson. You need to get you and your team out of there. Sheppard has an ordnance disposal team on the way."

"No, he's too fragile to move righ' now," Carson insisted.

"_He_ doesn't have to move. _You _do."

Cami tensed as she waited for Carson's reply. She bit down on her bottom lip, shifting anxiously from one foot to the other. She hated having to wait. The sound of alarms caught them all off guard, and she turned to Sheppard.

"What happened?" she asked uneasily.

"He's used his authorization code to seal off the whole level." Sheppard looked up from the computer screen. "We can't get to him."

Cami vaguely heard Rodney and Sheppard in the background trying to convince Carson to leave. She shook her head, her muscles springing to action.

"No, there has to be some way," she said forcefully, turning to Ronon. "He needs to get out of there. That bomb could explode any second. I'll go through the damn vents to get to him if I have to."

"I don't think that's gonna work this time," Ronon said quietly.

"We have to try," she cried out to him. "We can't just - "

"Colonel Sheppard," Carson's voice carried out through all their head sets. "I've extracted the tumor, and I'm opening up the O.R. level."

"I'm going down there," she told Sheppard as relief flooded through her body.

He gave her a curt nod, knowing that even if he had ordered her to stand down, she would have disobeyed. She jogged down the stairs, cursing at the still inoperable transporters.

"Sheppard, tell your team I'll meet them halfway," Carson suddenly announced. "The sooner I get this thing out of my sight the better."

Cami tapped her earpiece, quickening her steps. "No, Carson, just hold on."

"It's alrigh', love. I've go' this." There was a few seconds of stretched silence, then Carson was back on the radio. "We jus' made the hand-off."

Another explosion rocked Atlantis just as she reached the deck to the infirmary.

"Carson!" She practically punched the earpiece in an attempt to get a response. "Answer me, damn it!"

After that, everything happened in slow motion. She ran toward the smoke, toward the charred, metal walls that lined the corridor outside the O.R. And then she saw him. Carson's crumpled figure lying in the middle of the hallway.

She reached out for him, only to be stopped by a pair of strong arms circling around her waist. Cami fought against them, hardly noticing that it was Ronon holding on to her and that he had followed her down to the infirmary. He lifted her up, and she kicked out, using all of her strength to loosen herself from his firm embrace, but he wasn't letting go. The more she struggled against him, the tighter he held on.

"You can't see him like that," Ronon whispered gruffly in her ear. "He wouldn't want you to."

It was only then that Cami stopped fighting. She swallowed back the sob that was threatening to escape from her throat. She refused to break down in tears; she had to be strong for Carson.

The emergency crews arrived, along with Sheppard, Rodney and Weir, but Cami paid them no attention. Ronon let her go, though he remained by her side, ready to grab her again if need be. Only she wasn't going anywhere. Not while Carson was still lying there. Her eyes followed the activity in front of her, but her mind was somewhere else.

And, in that brief moment when they finally took Carson's body away, she felt that everything was _not _going to be okay.


	11. What is the Point of All This?

**As always, a big THANK YOU for the reviews, alerts, and favorites! :D**

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><p>Cami carefully opened the care package she had received that morning from Cruz. It held several small boxes of chocolate, some books, and four bottles of whisky. For the first time that day, the ghost of a smile touched her lips. It was just like him to include extra bottles of alcohol. There was also a perfectly sealed package marked "Perishables". Cami eyed it warily. She knew it was the haggis that she was going to share with Carson. She was about to push the box away when she noticed that Cruz had also included a note.<p>

_Cami,_

_Enjoy the haggis! I still can't believe you love that stuff. Tastes like ass to me. I can already hear Dad saying, "Aye, but in the right hands, it can taste like a mighty fine ass". Crazy dad and all the crazy things he used to say._

_Anyway, Carson sounds like a great guy! I'd really like to meet him one of these days. I'm glad to hear he's made your time in Atlantis easier. I included an extra bottle of whisky just for him as a gift for taking care of my little sister. _

She stopped reading after that, folding the note and throwing it back in the box. Letting out a tired sigh, she rubbed her hands over her face. It had been an extremely long day. She placed the care package on the floor next to her bed, making a mental note to throw away the box of frozen haggis the next time she left her room.

It seemed that no matter what she did, her mind kept reverting back to Carson. She shook her head, trying to clear her thoughts. Dwelling on his death would only do more harm than good, and so she forced herself to push it aside. There was a chime at her door, and she walked over to the door, running her hand along the sensor for it to open.

"Ronon?"

The tall man walked into the room. She looked at him curiously, waiting for him to say something. He stood off to the side, and then finally leaned against her desk, crossing his arms over his chest.

"Can I help you with something?" she asked, prodding him to explain his visit.

"I came to see how you were doing."

"I'm fine." When he didn't move, she asked, "Uh…yourself?"

He shrugged, pulling out the desk chair and straddling it. He leaned forward, arms resting on the backrest. She waited for him to say something, but he just continued sitting there, his eyes following her as she tidied up around her room.

She frowned at him, moving to sit on the bed and grabbing a book from her nightstand. Cami could feel his gaze on her, and she decided that two could play at the silent game. There was a reason he was there - a reason she was sure had to do with Carson. But as long as he didn't bring it up, then she wouldn't either.

Out of the corner of her eye, she saw him glance around the room. It was pretty sparse, especially compared to his. She hadn't really taken the time to decorate. Other than the picture frames on her desk and the books lining one side of the room, there was nothing really personal about it.

Ronon twisted around in his seat, grabbing one of the picture frames off her desk. Cami kept her eyes on her book, though what she was reading, she really didn't know. She must have read the same sentence about twenty times already. Her mind was just somewhere else.

"This is your twin brother?" Ronon asked skeptically.

Her eyes darted up just long enough to take a quick glimpse of the picture he held before moving back down to the book. It was a photograph her father had taken at their high school graduation. She and Cruz were all smiles, clad in their caps and gowns, arms around each other's shoulders.

"Yeah, that's Cruz."

He grunted. "You guys look nothing alike."

"So I've been told," Cami sighed. She closed her book in annoyance, shifting in her bed to look over at him. "Why are you here, Ronon?"

He took his sweet time answering. He grabbed another picture. This time, it was one of all three of her brothers. It was a candid picture that she had taken herself, showing them outside at a family barbecue.

"You were friends with Beckett," Ronon finally said, eyeing both pictures as if memorizing them before setting them back down.

"Yeah, so?" She picked up her book again, practically ripping it open. Cami closed her eyes, taking a deep breath to calm her nerves. She was not in the mood for this conversation. She had already done the mandatory session with Dr. Heightmeyer. Putting the book on her nightstand, she sat up a little straighter in bed. "Look, Ronon, I think I know why you're here. You don't have to worry about me. I've lost someone close before. It's no big deal. That's life, and you move on."

"McKay isn't taking it too well. Seems to think it's his fault Beckett died."

Cami felt a stab of guilt in her heart before reminding herself to stop thinking about it. "Yeah, well, that's McKay, not me." She stood up, making her way to the door and running her hand over the sensor so it could open again. "I'm fine, Ronon. Seriously. You can go tell Sheppard and Teyla to stop checking up on me. I'm not a child; I understand that death is a part of life."

She took another deep breath, realizing that she had spoken a little too sharply. But the fact of the matter was that she was tired of everyone asking her how she was doing. Yes, she had been friends with Carson. Yes, she felt guilty for his death. And, yes, she was having a hard time accepting it. But the past was the past and there was nothing she could do but move on.

"If there's nothing else…" She motioned to the door.

Ronon's gaze darkened as he watched her. She knew that he didn't believe her, but she didn't care. At the moment, all she wanted was to be left alone. After a few minutes of silence, where he continued staring at her and she continued averting his gaze, he finally stood up and took his leave. Cami locked the door behind him and then leaned her hands and face against it, the cold metal cooling her skin.

She let out a tired sigh. The following day was Carson's funeral. It was going to be a trying day, but she needed to have her game face on. She couldn't afford to lose her composure, not when she had been doing so well.

Cami pushed away from the door. There was only one place she knew of that would keep her mind off of everything. She pulled on her boots, grabbed her jacket and practically ran out the room. She was going to the firing range.

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><p>She had played the part well. Her long hair had been pulled back into a low bun, not a strand out of place like they usually were. Dress blues crisp and perfectly pressed. Face stoic. All in all, she presented a professional appearance. The soldier doing her duty.<p>

But, back in her room, her façade faltered. A quick wash of her face revealed the dark circles under her eyes. She unraveled her bun, running her fingers through her hair as it cascaded down her back. Walking out of her bathroom, she began unbuttoning her uniform jacket when there was a chime at the door. She frowned, wondering who would be visiting her at such a late hour. The door opened to reveal Ronon.

"Let's go spar," he said, leaning against the doorway so that the door would remain open.

"What, _now_? Seriously?" She threw her jacket on the bed and crossed her arms over her chest.

"Yeah," he shrugged. "Why not? It's late. The rooms should be empty."

"I'm exhausted, Ronon. All I want to do is just lay down and sle – "

"When was the last time you slept? I mean _really _slept?"

Cami rubbed the back of her neck. "I don't know…"

"Then let's go spar. Beats tossing around in bed waiting for sleep to come."

"It's been a long day," she protested, irritated that he was being so insistent. He had been at the funeral, too. He knew how hard the day had been, meeting with Carson's family, seeing them grieve.

"Fine," he said.

In two long strides, he reached her. Before she even had a chance to ask him what the hell he was doing, she was already being flung over his shoulder. He turned around, her head narrowly missing the wall as he strode out the room.

"Wait! Ronon, hold on, I'll go with you...just put me down." Thankfully, no one was out in the hallway because Cami knew she made for a ridiculous sight. Ronon seemed to be debating whether he could believe her or not. "I need to change. I can't spar like this."

He nodded, acknowledging that she had a point and set her down gently. She changed quickly in her bathroom while Ronon waited in her room - he probably thought she was going to lock him out of her room the second she entered - and then followed him to one of the gyms.

They started off slow, going through some basic defense postures. Cami followed along almost mechanically. She had no desire to be sparring; she had only gone along with it to get Ronon off her back.

Little by little, Ronon kept increasing his speed. Cami had to actually focus on what she was doing to keep up with him. He blocked one of her punches, grabbing her arm and twisting it so that she kneeled in defeat. She let out a low grunt, glaring up at him as he continued to hold her down.

"I think you've made your point," she hissed. "I suck at hand to hand. Can I go back to my room now?"

"Not until I get a good fight out of you."

He released her, pushing her away so that she stumbled backwards a few steps. She scowled at him, getting angry at his unnecessary roughness. But he just stood there pretending like nothing had happened. She striked again, her leg lashing out in a low kick. He grabbed it, then swiftly reached down to sweep her other leg from under her. She fell hard on her back, the wind knocked out from her stomach.

"Fuck," she managed to groan.

She rolled onto all fours, trying hard to catch her breath. What the hell was he playing at? The anger surged through her veins as she stood up again. A few wisps of hair had escaped her ponytail, but she blew them away absentmindedly as her eyes focused on Ronon.

Cami ran at him, letting the anger take control. She attempted to tackle him, only to have him sidestep her, then trip her as she rushed past him. His nicely timed moved sent her flying across the room. She landed painfully, the momentum causing her to roll over a few times until she finally came to a stop.

"I'm done," she groused, picking herself up from the floor. "I don't want to spar anymore."

He stood in front of the doorway, arms crossed over his chest, but Cami was not in the mood to humor him anymore. He'd had his fun, showing her up on his stupid perfect moves. She didn't know why he even bothered to invite her to spar, and, at the moment, she didn't care to know. But, apparently, Ronon was not done with her. He grabbed her arm as she brushed past him.

"Stop being an ass," she said. The humor that's usually in her voice when she curses is gone. In its place is irritation as her temper flares up again. "I told you I don't want to spar anymore."

Cami tried yanking her arm from his grip, but he wasn't letting go. She narrowed her eyes at him, showing him that she was not amused, but all she gets in response is a raised eyebrow. He seemed to be challenging her again with his eyes. She made an attempt to leave again, but Ronon pulled her forcefully so that her body slammed into his. He held both arms behind her back, forcing her against him so that she couldn't move.

"Stop it!" she demanded. "Let me go!"

She struggled against him but just like before, the more she fought, the tighter he held on to her. Their bodies are pressed tightly together. Cami could smell that leathery musk of his, feel his muscles contracting in his arms and chest every time she tries pulling away.

"Stop!" she said again, only her anger is slowly being replaced by something else. "Stop…I can't…"

"Can't what?"

She shakes her head, blinking back tears. "I can't do this anymore," she whispers. She struggled against him once again, attempting to leave so that he won't see her cry, but he maintains his tight grip on her. "I can't…fight anymore."

And then the tears come, leaving hot trails down her cheeks. She's vaguely aware that he's let go of her arms, and she reaches up to his chest, bunching up his shirt in her fists as small sobs begin to escape her lips.

Ronon puts his arms around her, offering his strength, and she gladly takes it. The sparring, the anger, the crying has left her drained. The sobs turn into hiccups, and the tears are gone as fast as they started. Suddenly, she feels exhausted, but she doesn't move. She feels safe in Ronon's arms…like the world could collapse around them but absolutely nothing would happen to her. She inhales his scent again, his warmth engulfing her and making her sleepy.

Cami doesn't know how long they stood there. Ronon makes no attempt to leave, and she doesn't either, perfectly content to just remain in his arms forever. She lets out a small sigh against his chest…

And there, in the smallest recesses of her mind, is the thought that maybe someone else on Atlantis cares about her, too.


	12. Not Much, Just You

**Wow, I had so many technical problems with this chapter, I thought that it just didn't want to be written. Long story short, I lost what I had originally written and had to start from scratch. I apologize for the late update.**

**A big THANK YOU to everyone who reviewed, alerted, and favorited! **

**Enjoy! :D**

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><p>Cami leaned back in her chair, looking out at the ocean. Her fingers absentmindedly traced the food tray in front of her, still left uneaten. She was sitting at the same table where she had tried to set up Teyla and Sheppard, overlooking the deck and far enough away to not be bothered.<p>

She released her hair from the confines of her ponytail, shaking out the long tresses as a slight breeze passed through the deck. The sun was already going down over the horizon, casting the sky in hues of pink, red and yellow. She removed her sunglasses, placing them in one of the pockets of her jacket.

"Is this seat taken?"

She looked up, startled, to find Evan looking down at her, tray in hand. She shook her head, gesturing to the empty chair across from her.

"How are you?" he asked gently.

"Great," she replied, shifting in her seat to face him. He leaned forward giving her a disbelieving look. "Okay, maybe not great," she acknowledged. "But I'm getting there."

He nodded, satisfied with her answer as he began to dig into his food. They remained in comfortable silence for a little while as he continued to eat, and her gaze found its way back to the ocean.

"You look different with your hair down," he commented as he took a drink from his water bottle.

"How so?" she asked, raising an eyebrow at him.

"Not in a bad way!" he said immediately, throwing her a playful smile. "It looks good. You should wear it down more often."

"Thanks. I usually don't have a reason to wear it down so take a good look. The next time you see me, my hair will be up in its usual messy ponytail."

Evan finished up with his meal, wiping his hands on a napkin before throwing it back on his empty food tray. He leaned back in his seat, crossing his arms over his chest.

"Listen, I usually host a poker game every Friday night in my room. Nothing too big, just a couple of the guys getting together to have a few beers. Why don't you join us?"

Her eyes flicked over to his. "Really?"

"Sure," he smiled at her again. "And, hey, it'll give you a reason to let your hair down...so to speak."

"I wouldn't want to impose..."

"You wouldn't," he assured her. "Unless you're some sort of poker shark who's going to steal all our money..." He gave her a wink. "Seriously, though, come by my room this Friday at seven - "

"Hey." Ronon suddenly appeared out of nowhere. His food tray clanked on the table as he took the seat next to hers.

Cami lowered her gaze to the table, the spork on her plate suddenly looking very interesting. She was still embarrassed that she had cried all over him.

"Well, it seems like I've overstayed my welcome," Evan said awkwardly as he looked from her to Ronon. He grabbed his tray and got up to leave saying, "I'll be waiting for you on Friday!"

"What's going on Friday?" Ronon asked, chewing on a piece of meat.

"It's nothing," she shrugged. "Evan just invited me to his weekly poker game."

"You goin'?"

"Yeah, I guess so. I have nothing else to do."

She let out a sigh, running her fingers through her hair to pick it up in a ponytail again, but Ronon grabbed one of her wrists to stop her.

"Don't. You look good like that," he said simply.

Cami could feel her cheeks flushing at his compliment, and she wondered why Ronon's comment meant so much more to her than Evan's.

"Ronon, I've been meaning to talk to you." She reached out to place a hand on his arm. She felt his muscles tensing under her fingers, but he didn't move away. "I wanted to thank you for being there for me that day."

Cami didn't elaborate, knowing full well that Ronon knew what she was talking about. He shrugged as if it was no big deal, but he stopped eating. His eyes met hers, and she saw a brief swirl of conflicting emotions.

"There's something I wanted to run by you," she continued. She noticed that the mess hall was starting to fill up with the dinner crowd. "Maybe we can go somewhere more private?"

He nodded, picking up both their trays and depositing them in the bin for dirty dishes. Cami's mind was too occupied to notice where they were going. She almost ran into his back when he stopped in front of his room and ran his hand over the sensor to open the door.

"What's wrong?" he asked worriedly as he led her into his room.

"Nothing...it's just...I've been thinking about writing letters to my brothers. You know, in case something happens to me..."

"Nothing's going to happen to you."

"How can you know that? Carson's death is proof of the dangers we subject ourselves to every day. I could easily just die tomorrow - "

"I won't let you die."

He said it with such force that she looked up at him in surprise. Anger briefly flashed through his green eyes before he looked away, frowning. Cami stared at him, mouth slightly open in bewilderment. She didn't know what to say. She had never heard Ronon say anything so _personal _about her.

"Please, Ronon, just listen to me," she pleaded. "You're the only one I feel comfortable telling this to."

He nodded reluctantly, leaning back against the wall as he waited for her to continue.

"I want you to have those letters. If something happens to me, you have to find Cruz - he's the only one that knows I'm here - and deliver the letters to him. Can you do that for me? Please?"

She walked over to him, reaching out to grip his arm. His body stiffened, and she was just about to move away so that he wouldn't feel uncomfortable, when he shifted.

He turned around, cupping her face in both his hands. Cami's eyes widened in surprise. Her heart pounded in her chest as Ronon leaned down, almost hesitantly, to brush his lips over hers. She let out a gasp at the electricity that coursed through her body.

Her eyes flicked to his, and she noticed the same shock, the same confusion at such a powerful reaction to such minimal contact. He combed his fingers through her hair, drawing it back from her face. Then, his gaze darkened as he lowered his lips to hers once again.

Cami gave in, parting her mouth and allowing him inside. Their tongues tasted and explored. It was a long, slow, deep kiss, filled with a longing that neither expected. Want turned to need. Her hands slid over his stomach, tracing up to his chest and finally wound around his neck bringing him closer to her.

Her mouth warred with his, each reveling in the passion their kiss evoked. Cami lost herself in Ronon as their bodies pressed together. She barely noticed her jacket being slipped off her shoulders, falling to the floor in a slight swish. Her fingers moved down to work the leather ties on Ronon's shirt. He pulled away from her long enough to yank the shirt over his head.

He feathered kisses down her neck, and she let out a soft moan, raking her fingernails down his back. He hissed, his lips ghosting over the skin on her neck and jaw.

"Melena," he whispered gruffly.

Cami stiffened. She took a step back, pressing her fingers to her swollen lips. She saw the immediate regret in his eyes, but the damage had already been done.

"I'm sor - "

"No, it's...it's okay." Cami turned around on the pretense of looking for her jacket, hoping he hadn't seen the tears that had welled up in her eyes. She took a few calming breaths and plastered a fake smile on her face as she put on her jacket and turned back to him. "I, uh...I need to go. I forgot I have this…thing at that…place…"

"Wait," he grabbed her arm to stop her. "Don't go. I didn't mean – "

"Don't worry about it," she shrugged, feigning indifference. Cami was surprised at how strong her voice sounded. She slipped her arm from his grasp. "Really, it's okay. I understand."

Cami forced herself not to run out the door. She kept her head held high, only quickening her steps until she reached the safety of the hallway and was sure Ronon wasn't looking at her. She pulled on her sunglasses, ignoring the curious stares from people that walked past her.

"Hey, Buchanan!" Sheppard called out from behind her just as she reached the transporter. "Have you seen Ronon? I've been trying to get him on the radio, but he hasn't answered my calls."

She shook her head, deciding to forgo the transporter and heading for the stairs instead. The faster she got to her room, the better.

"I'm on my way to his room," Sheppard continued as he caught up to her. "Just wanted to make sure he's...whoa, what's wrong?"

"Nothing, I'm just in a hurry," she replied tersely as she jogged up the flight of stairs to her deck.

"What's with the sunglasses? Jesus, kid, you look like shi - "

"I'm fine!" she snapped as she rounded on him halfway up the stairs. Cami closed her eyes, taking a deep breath to calm down. "I'm sorry," she said, her voice taking on a softer tone. "I just...I'm in a hurry."

Sheppard held up his hands in defense, nodding slowly, though his eyes clearly showed he didn't believe her. Cami left him standing on the stairs, walking quickly to her room and locking the door behind her.

She ripped off her jacket, flinging it across the room. Her hands fisted at her sides as she paced in front of her bed. She took a deep breath. She was _not _going to cry over such a silly thing as hurt feelings.

_"No, I'm not ready yet."_

Ronon's words reverberated in her mind. She was angry at herself for getting caught up in the moment and letting things get as far as they did. How could she be so stupid? Of course he still loved his wife, or whatever the hell Melena had been to him.

She stepped into her bathroom, removing her sunglasses and splashing cold water on her face. Cami glanced up, catching her reflection in the mirror. Her lips were still swollen from Ronon's kisses. She could still feel Ronon's hands in her hair, his hot breath on her neck, the muscled hardness of his body pressed against her own. His taste, his scent...it was all still there with her.

_Get over it, Buchanan_, she chastised herself. _It was nothing. It _meant_ nothing_.

Only it meant everything.

She let out a surprised gasp, her mind finally catching up to her heart. She was falling in love with him.


	13. Where's the Antidote?

**I am certainly thankful for a lot of things in my life and having such amazing readers is definitely at the top! :) As always, thank you so much for the reviews, alerts and favorites!**

**This chapter is in Ronon's point of view (thanks to sagey for suggesting it!). It was a little hard to get into his head, and I apologize if he seems out of character. It's a short chapter, but I will definitely make up for it in the next chapter. ;)**

**I wanted to send out a big THANKS to EllathiaCroft who's helping me out with her medical expertise on another story I'm working on. :D**

**Enjoy!**

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><p>"Wow, Ronon, this is the most interesting conversation I've ever had. I don't think anyone could work the silence quite like you," Sheppard said sarcastically.<p>

Ronon looked up from his work long enough to throw his friend a sardonic look. They were in the armory, sitting across from each other at a table while they cleaned their weapons. For the past hour that they had been there, Ronon had remained silent, only issuing the occasional grunt whenever Sheppard mentioned something of slight interest.

"Okay, I've had enough of this," Sheppard finally said, letting out a long, exaggerated sigh as he leaned back in his chair and linked his fingers behind his head. "What the hell's going on with you and Buchanan? And don't say 'nothing' because I _know _that something happened between you two."

Ronon didn't say anything for a few minutes as he gathered his thoughts. He made a pretense of putting one of the pistols back together before looking up at Sheppard with a frown.

"We kissed," he answered quietly as if afraid that they would be overheard even though the only other person in the room was the armory quartermaster who was nowhere near hearing distance.

"You're kidding!" Sheppard exclaimed, his eyes widening in surprise.

Ronon shook his head, crossing his arms over his chest.

"I, uh...I take it it didn't go so well then," Sheppard commented with a slight cough. "Geez, Chewy, do you kiss _that _bad?"

Ronon glared at him, his hands turning into fists. "It wasn't that," he hissed, still feeling the rush of fire in his veins every time he thought about the kiss. "It was...something else."

Sheppard stared at him expectantly. "Well, spit it out. What happened?"

"I..." he hesitated, leaning forward on the table awkwardly. "I said Melena's name."

"Melena being your..."

Ronon nodded, running a hand over his dreadlocks.

"Holy crap, Ronon, even _I_ know better than to say something that stupid," Sheppard noted with a shake of his head. "Did you _mean _to say Melena's name?"

"No...I don't know." Ronon stood, propping back against the table. He grabbed his energy gun and began flipping it around in his hand. "I wasn't thinking about Melena at all. Her name just came out."

"Do you have feelings for Buchanan?"

Ronon's gun clattered on the floor as he dropped it. It was a question he had been asking himself for a while now. He grunted in annoyance, afraid of the answer.

"I thought so," Sheppard confirmed, taking Ronon's silence as enough of an answer. "Look, buddy, I think what you're feeling is guilt. Subconsciously, you feel like you're betraying Melena for having feelings for someone else." He glanced down at the weapons on the table between them. "So, is this your way of apologizing? 'Cause if it is, you should know that the way to a girl's heart is not by cleaning her weapons."

"Like _you _know anything about romance," Ronon scoffed with a roll of his eyes. He sat back down, pulling the parts of the sniper rifle closer so that he could start reassembling it.

"I know enough," Sheppard retorted. "You have to shower them with gifts. Chocolates, flowers, jewelry...you name it."

Ronon narrowed his eyes at his friend. "Maybe you should practice what you preach."

"What do you mean by that?" Sheppard asked innocently.

"You know what I mean. You and Teyla..."

"There's nothing going on between me and Teyla."

"I never said there was," Ronon calmly replied, recalling an earlier conversation.

"Ha, using my own words against me. Clever. But maybe you should focus more on fixing things with Buchanan."

"And you should focus on getting things started with Teyla."

Sheppard opened his mouth to reply when he suddenly help up a hand, motioning to his earpiece. He tapped it in response to whoever was contacting him. "Got it. We'll meet you in the conference room in fifteen minutes." He turned to Ronon. "Weir says that they might have found a location for a ZPM."

Ronon raised an eyebrow in response and nodded. Sheppard contacted the rest of the team, and they finished reassembling whatever was left on the table before making their way to the conference room. They walked in silence, each lost in their own thoughts until Ronon felt Sheppard elbow his ribs.

Camila was walking up to them, and Ronon frowned at the reaction he got just by seeing her. He felt nervous. His palms had turned clammy, and his heartbeat had quickened. She gave them a small nod in greeting, her green eyes careful not to make eye contact with him. Tucking a strand of hair behind her ear, she ducked her head and walked past them to go into the conference room, leaving the sweet smell of exotic flowers in the air behind her.

Sheppard elbowed him again, his eyebrows raising as if imploring him to say something. Ronon shook his head, following his friend to one side of the conference table and sitting down. She was sitting opposite them, greeting Teyla warmly as the Athosian entered the room. He was just taking note of that dimple that formed in the corner of her mouth whenever she smiled when he felt Sheppard kicking him.

He glared at his friend, narrowing his eyes as a silent indicator for Sheppard to stop hitting him. Instead, Sheppard wagged his eyebrows in the direction across the table. Again, Ronon shook his head only to have Sheppard slam his elbow into his ribs for a third time. Ronon hissed in irritation, blatantly punching Sheppard in the arm and causing for both women to turn to them with curious looks in their eyes.

"I cleaned your weapons," Ronon blurted out.

She frowned, her light eyes darkening in confusion. Beside her, Teyla tried hard to hold back a smile. "I didn't - "

"I know," he interrupted. "I wanted to..."

He suddenly stopped talking when he saw that Lorne and his team had also entered the room. Ronon grunted, leaning back in his seat and crossing his arms over his chest when Lorne took the seat next to her.

"Good, everyone's here," Weir announced as she walked in with McKay and Zelenka. "I'll keep this short. We're not entirely certain, but we may have found a location for a ZPM." She motioned to McKay who stepped forward after connecting his computer tablet to the large screen.

"I was reviewing - "

Zelenka cleared his throat, interrupting McKay's speech. McKay rolled his eyes at him and started again.

"Okay, _we _were reviewing some topographical maps of M3X-236, and we noticed a strange ring covering a large section of the northern area of the main land mass over here." McKay pointed to the screen and magnified the area with the ring. "We believe it's some sort of magnetic interference...almost like an invisible shield, if you will. What else could it be protecting but a Zed-PM?"

"Whoa, whoa, whoa...wait a minute," Sheppard leaned forward in his seat. "M3X-236? Isn't that where we ran into the Kinji warriors?"

"Yes," Weir acknowledged. "All the more reason to go into this with the utmost caution."

After that, Ronon only half listened. His gaze found its way across the table. Camila was chewing on her bottom lip thoughtfully as she listened intently to Weir's plan to retrieve the supposed ZPM. Her dark hair had been pulled back into a ponytail, and his mind immediately reverted to that night in his room when she had left it down at his request. He could still feel the long, silky tresses through his fingers, still smell the irressistible essence of flowers and gun powder on her skin, still taste her soft, sweet lips...

"So it's settled," Sheppard announced, pulling Ronon from his thoughts. "We can't risk sending two teams at once like we did last time. My team will go in and investigate, checking in every hour. If, for some reason, we miss a check-in, then Lorne and his team will get sent in. In and out, nice and easy. I've got a good feeling about this one, guys." He offered them a crooked smile.

McKay let out a snort of amusement. "Famous last words..."

* * *

><p>Nice and easy were definitely not the correct words for this mission. The mysterious ring was located in a particularly dense area of the forest, leaving them to park the jumper in a clearing a good distance away. They had been making good time, quietly walking over the rough terrain when McKay let out a gasp. They all turned to him, weapons poised and ready, eyes carefully scanning the gaps between the thick trees.<p>

"I left the life signs detector on the jumper," McKay whispered, frantically patting all the pockets on his vest and cargo pants.

"And you just remembered _now_?" Ronon hissed.

The longer they remained in one place, the more danger they were in. Ronon couldn't help but feel the uneasiness creeping through his veins. The last time they had been on that planet, the Kinji had ambushed them, stealthily and successfully tracking and capturing them in a matter of minutes. While they were better prepared this time, Ronon still maintained a cautious watch around them.

"I don't see _you _carrying around all this electronic equipment," McKay snapped back.

"Fine," Sheppard sighed. "Maybe it's better if we split up anyway. The smaller the group, the faster and quieter we can travel. Teyla and I will go on ahead. You three head back to the jumper. Hopefully, we'll have found something by the time you get back to us."

McKay handed his pack to Sheppard, and then they separated, one group continuing forward and the other retracing their steps back. Ronon took the lead as they powerwalked it back to the jumper. McKay huffed behind him, and Camila led up the rear. He spared her a quick glance. Her hand rested on the butt of one of her pistols as her eyes swept the area around them. He could see the muscles flexing in her forearm, ready to spring into action at the first sign of trouble.

They were about halfway back to the jumper when Ronon abruptly stopped. McKay ran into his back, cursing as he stumbled back.

"What the hell!" the scientist grumbled. "Why did you - "

But he was cut off when Camila placed a hand over McKay's mouth. She looked at him questioningly, but Ronon just held up his hand for them to remain silent. He looked around them, unsure if what he was sensing was what he thought it was. But he had never been wrong.

Ronon frowned, narrowing his eyes and straining his ears. Too many years of running had honed an almost sixth sense in him.

"We have to go," he said, a powerful feeling of danger washing over him. He pushed both of them ahead of him as he charged up his weapon. "Now."

Camila unholstered both her pistols as they ran back to the jumper. "What's wrong? What is it?"

Ronon took a second to reply as a small whirring sound in the sky confirmed his suspicions. Hatred rushed through his veins, and he was unable to keep it out of his voice.

"Wraith."


	14. Making This Up As I Go Along

**Wow, writing action is hard! My hat goes off to those who do a tremendous job with action scenes. **

**But, anyway, as promised, here is a long chapter to both make up for the tardiness in updating and for the short chapter last time. Thanks for the reviews, alerts, and favorites! :D**

**And because I always reply to my reviews:**

**Anonymous: Wow, that is such a great compliment! I am truly honored. Hope you continue to enjoy the story! :D**

**renzei27: I totally went back and checked out my story when I read your first comment. I thought the fanfiction website was messing up, lol. I'm so glad you're liking it so far. :) Sorry for the late update!**

**Military terms:**

**Sitrep: Situation report**

**SNAFU: Situation Normal, All Fucked Up**

* * *

><p>"Go faster! Faster!" McKay shouted hysterically.<p>

"I'm trying," Cami said through gritted teeth. She maneuvered the jumper, weaving in and out of the tops of the trees in an attempt to dodge the three Wraith darts following them. She tapped her earpiece. "Sir, we've got Wraith."

"_This isn't funny, Buchanan_," Sheppard's voice rang loudly in her ear.

"Does it sound like I'm laughing, Sheppard?" She brought up the HUD, making sure the darts were still right on them.

"_Sitrep?_"

"SNAFU, sir. We're in the jumper. I've got three darts on my tail. I'm trying to lead them away from you."

"_Okay, we're almost at the - _"

A burst of sharp static cut off the rest of Sheppard's sentence. Cami instinctively winced at the sound, and she tapped her earpiece to turn it off.

"What the hell was that!" She spared McKay a quick glance.

The scientist shrugged. "I'm guessing they reached the magnetic field. It's jamming the communications."

"Of course it is," Cami sighed.

She threw out a few drones, and they caught the closest dart. It exploded behind them sending a rumbling shake through the jumper.

"Maybe you can try to get us on the ground," Ronon suggested from the passenger seat.

His hands were clenched into fists, and Cami could tell that what he _really _wanted was to fight them face to face - something she wasn't too keen on doing. Despite her obvious lack of both flying and hand to hand combat skills, she would rather fight the Wraith from the air than take it to the ground. At least the jumper offered some sense of protection, not to mention drones.

"Oh, that part'll happen pretty definitely," she said under her breath as the jumper got sideswiped by one dart's energy blast. Alarms blared around the cockpit, but she quickly shut them off.

"Do something! The jumper doesn't have shields!" McKay yelled as he gripped the console in front of him.

"You're a miracle worker. Can't you give us shields?"

"Can you give me three hours?"

"Damn it, McKay, give me a break here! I'm not exactly trained in aeronautic evasive maneuvers. Do _you _want to fly the jumper?" she asked sarcastically, zooming through the trees as two more darts caught up to them.

"As a matter of fact, I do."

"Oh," Cami replied blankly. "Well...you can't." The Stargate came into view, and a sudden thought popped into her head. "Hey, do you guys know of any addresses to uninhabitable planets or, I don't know, space?"

"We can't leave!" McKay exclaimed. "Sheppard and Teyla are waiting for us! Besides, how is that gonna get rid of the Wraith?"

"We're coming back," she assured him. "We just need to buy Sheppard and Teyla some time."

"What do you have in mind?" Ronon asked.

"I, uh, I don't really know. I'm kinda making this up as I go along." She bit down on her bottom lip, sending out two more drones so that they collided with another dart. "Look, all I know is that we can't keep this up forever. The drone supply is limited, and who knows how many more darts will show up once these three, and the two we hit, don't make it back."

Ronon nodded, punching in an address on the DHD. Cami turned the jumper in a wide arc as the gate activated. The darts seemed to sense their departure, and they quickly followed. The gate took them to another planet. A great expanse of desert loomed before them, the white sand radiating waves of heat off the surface.

"Now what?"

Cami looked at Ronon reassuringly, hoping he couldn't see the same question in her eyes. There were no trees in which to hide or take cover here. It was just the sand and the sky for miles on end. She moved the jumper in a zig-zag form, as she launched another two drones behind them.

"Cloak still work?" she asked McKay.

The scientist stood and opened up a panel in the cargo hold. "All systems are still operable. Why?" he asked suspiciously. "What do you have in mind?"

Cami ignored him briefly as she turned back to Ronon. "Know another address?" He, too, eyed her warily but nodded again. "Dial it when I tell you to," she said as she turned her full attention back to the HUD displayed over the viewport.

Cami led the darts far enough away before pulling around again to face the Stargate. She increased the jumper's speed as she made a beeline for the gate.

"What are you..." McKay stared at her for a few seconds and then it dawned on him. "Oh, no. No, no, no...that's impossible. The jumper can't pull off a move like that. Not even Sheppard can - "

"Does anyone else have any other ideas?" They all looked at each other and shook their heads. "Then we have to try."

She gave Ronon the signal to dial the gate. The wormhole opened up just as she activated the cloak. At the last possible second, she veered the jumper up, right before it could switch to autopilot. The darts that were following them flew through the gate. Silence filled the interior of the jumper.

"We...did it," McKay whispered, going back to the control panel in the cargo hold. "Minor structural damage from that energy blast earlier but nothing serious. I can't believe that actually worked."

Cami let out a breath she hadn't realized she had been holding. "Neither do I," she admitted, bringing the jumper around again. "That was awesome!"

She offered them both a smile as she dialed the address to M3X-236, hoping that Sheppard and Teyla were outside the magnetic field already. The planet seemed distinctly quieter again as they zoomed back around. The Wraith seemed to be gone for the moment, and from up in the air, the Kinji didn't really seem like a real threat.

"Maybe I can fly around the field," Cami proposed, already making her way over to the north side of the land mass. "Hopefully, Sheppard or Teyla will be able to see us and know that we're okay."

"Wait, Captain! Don't - "

But McKay's words were cut short as the feeling of weightlessness reached their stomachs. Cami lost control of the jumper as everything shut down. They fell, the jumper skimming through the treetops as their momentum crashed them forward.

They all tumbled out of their seats, riding the jumper like some sort of crazy rollercoaster ride. After what seemed like an eternity, they finally came to a stop. Cami let out a groan of pain as she rolled herself off the viewport and onto the dashboard.

" - get too close to the magnetic field," McKay finished his sentence, wincing as he sat up and grabbed at his ankle. "It'll disrupt the jumper's system."

Cami looked up long enough to fix him with a good frown. "Now you tell me."

* * *

><p>Cami and Ronon stood back to back with McKay sitting against a tree at their feet. The Kinji were closing in on them. She could see them through the trees. She took out her pistols, aiming one in front of her and the other to her right. Behind her, she heard Ronon charge his gun.<p>

"How many can you count?" she whispered, pistols gripped tightly in her hands.

"Can't tell...trees are too thick. Maybe eight."

Cami nodded. "I'm counting at least six on my side." There was a slight pause in which they both took a second to assess the situation. The odds were against them, but Cami was more than sure of hers and Ronon's abilities. "Ready?"

"Ready," Ronon affirmed.

Back to back, they worked together as a team. The awkwardness of their kiss was all but lost in the heat of battle. Spears flew past them and they ducked and dodged, never leaving each other's sides. Ronon holstered his gun, raising his arms above and behind him to reach for her Kukri knives that were strapped to her back. He unsheathed them, bringing them down swiftly to deflect a spear that was flying right at McKay.

Cami, in turn, reached down to release Ronon's combat knife from the strap on his leg. She flipped it so that the blade landed in her hand before flinging it out at a Kinji warrior that had gotten too close. The knife pierced the warrior's chest, and he fell dead a few feet from them.

For the next few minutes, the only sounds were of her pistols firing or the whistle of her knives in the air as they continued to fight. McKay offered the occasional burst of his P90 from his position on the ground. Cami dropped her empty clips and loaded full magazines into her pistols. It had turned surprisingly quiet, and they waited. Their eyes searched for more danger, their weapons aimed and ready for the next attack. Only it didn't come.

When it became clear that the Kinji warriors that had attacked them were finally all dead, Cami relaxed, holstering her pistols and turning to help McKay up. Ronon wasn't so quick to let down his guard. He sheathed the knives into the scabbards on her back and readied his weapon, keeping an eye on their surroundings.

Cami left McKay to lean against a tree while she walked over to the Kinji warrior with Ronon's knife in his chest. She knelt down, pulling the knife out and wiping the blade on her pant leg. Sudden movement out of the corner of her eye caused her to turn sharply. She looked up in time to see a warrior running at them full speed, his arm swinging forward as he released his spear.

"Shit! Ronon!" Cami cried out a second too late.

She sprang up, diving in front of Ronon as the Satedan turned around in alarm. The spear impaled her left shoulder just as Ronon blasted the warrior in the head. Cami let out a sharp cry of pain as she landed on the ground.

"Are you...are you okay?" McKay gasped. He limped closer to her despite the obvious pain from his swollen ankle.

Cami clutched at her shoulder. As she moved, the weight of the spear shifted, sending bolts of pain shooting down her every nerve. She shot McKay an angry look.

"Of course I'm not okay! I just got impaled with a spear right here!" she exclaimed, gesturing to her shoulder as if to emphasize the situation.

"Well, it seems your charming personality is doing just fine," McKay muttered after hearing her tirade. "Besides, considering the circumstances, I'd have to say this was a pretty successful confrontation."

"I got impaled!" she repeated. "Right here!"

Cami could feel the blood trickling down her arm, and she was almost afraid to look down at the wound. Ronon helped her up, and she bit down on her lip to keep from crying out in pain every time she moved.

"We have to fall back to the jumper," Ronon calmly explained, his gaze even more alert to their surroundings. "You two are in no condition to travel."

Cami nodded, figuring it would be safer to go back than to continue forward. She knew it was only a matter of time before more Kinji showed up. Ronon put McKay's arm around his shoulder and then held out his hand to her.

"I'm fine," she grunted, forcing herself not to wince in pain. "Just help McKay. I'm right behind you."

She slowly followed them back to the jumper, her right arm trying to hold the spear in place. She took great care not to jolt the spear unnecessarily, but it was a little hard considering the shaft was slick with blood. Once they reached the jumper, Ronon set McKay down on the cargo hold seat and immediately closed the cargo door.

"How long do I have before the poison starts taking over?" she hissed through her teeth.

"I-I don't know. I never got the chance to read Carson's analysis of Major Lorne," McKay answered honestly. "But the more you freak out - "

"I have a fucking three-foot wooden spear in my shoulder, McKay! Of course I'm gonna freak out!"

Cami knew that the more she panicked, the faster the poison would course through her veins. But now that the adrenaline was starting to wear off, the reality of the situation was starting to hit her.

"Camila."

Ronon's calm voice broke through her hysteria. It was hearing her name, more than anything, that got her to quiet down. It was the first time she had ever heard him say it. Her eyes flicked to his, and she tried desperately to retain that calmness that he so easily exuded.

"What?" she answered bitterly though there was really no bite to it.

"I need to remove the spear," he explained slowly.

His hand reached out to touch her, but she flinched, taking a step back.

"No, don't touch it," she gasped.

"Do you trust me?"

"Of course," Cami answered without hesitation.

"Then let me help you."

She didn't say anything for a few seconds. She knew the spear had to come out...but she also knew it was going to be extremely painful. Cami finally nodded her consent, and Ronon helped her sit down on the floor of the cargo hold.

The spear had pierced her shoulder right on the outside of her vest strap, preventing the spear from being removed without first cutting off her vest. Ronon quickly set to work, using a combat knife to tear her t-shirt and then using the serrated blade to saw through the strap of her vest and the band of her knife scabbard. He was careful to avoid jarring the spear, and Cami marveled at his attentiveness. When he was done, he used a smaller knife to cut the straps of her tank top and sports bra. Ronon pushed the material down, leaving her shoulder bare. He had a grim look on his face as he inspected the extent of her wound.

"That bad?" she whispered. She could feel the beads of sweat forming on her brow, and she hastily wiped at them with the back of her hand.

Ronon gave her a small smile. "I've seen worse." He took off one of his leather bracelets and handed it to her. "Here. Bite down on this."

Cami took it reluctantly but did as he said. One of his hands grabbed the spear tightly, pressing it down to her shoulder to keep it steady. A soft whimper escaped her lips before she could stop it. She bit down hard on the bracelet and closed her eyes, but not before seeing Ronon grab one of her knives with his other hand.

The whistle of the knife sliced through the air, and she felt a slight jarring as the blade cut through the spear. Cami opened her eyes to find the spear cleanly cut in half. She tensed up, knowing what was coming next.

"You know, I think I kinda like the spear sticking out of my shoulder like that," she said weakly. "Makes for interesting conversation..."

Ronon shook his head at her, moving away long enough to grab a first aid kit. She noticed that his hands were covered in blood, and she briefly wondered exactly how much of the vital fluid she had already lost.

"Lean into me," he ordered as he sat down in front of her.

"And don't pass out," McKay added. "The poison...we don't know if you'll ever wake up if you faint."

Cami had almost forgotten the scientist was there. She blinked up at him, a cloudy haze slowly obscuring her vision. A retort died on the tip of her tongue as Ronon scooted closer to her. She buried her face in the crook of his neck, gripping his shirt tightly with her right hand.

She was starting to feel slightly woozy, and she knew that the poison was starting to take effect. She inhaled sharply as Ronon slid the spear out of her shoulder, and the leather bracelet fell from her mouth. The warmth of blood gushed down her back, and Cami forced herself to focus on the pain to remain lucid.

Ronon kept one arm around around her, holding her close to him while his other hand worked to stop the flow of blood. Cami's hands fell down limply as she felt her strength slowly leaving her.

"Camila," Ronon pulled her back, and her head lolled to the side. She saw his worried look through her half-lidded eyes. "Stay with me. Don't lose consciousness. You have to stay awake..."

Cami stared blankly at the man in front of her. He was talking to her, but she couldn't make out what he was saying. The ethereal glow surrounding him seemed to drown out everything else. She let out a small gasp at his beauty. Her right hand slowly found its way up to stroke the side of his face, marring his cheek with streaks of blood. He was a warrior. She could feel his strength under her fingertips.

"Ares and Adonis," she whispered to him, and his green eyes darkened in confusion. "A perfect mixture of both."

She saw him turn to the other man who was sitting on a seat above them. Their voices were muffled, sounding almost like she was underwater. She shook her head to clear her thoughts but it only made her dizzy. She tried moving away, but a sharp pain on her left side caused her to cry out. The man turned to her again. He ran his fingers through her hair, sweeping back the strands from her face. His mouth opened again...he seemed to be pleading with her.

"Por que você está aqui?" she asked him, the haze of disorientation making her head swim. "Para me salvar?"

His perfect features contracted in confusion. Why couldn't he understand her? She thought she was being perfectly clear.

"Are you here to save me?" she asked again and this time it looked like he understood her perfectly. Her eyelids fell heavily as exhaustion took over.

"Camila," his deep voice broke through whatever trance she was under.

Cami's eyes fluttered open as she gasped for air. "Ronon," she breathed out, her hand gripping his shirt again. "I have to tell you something...before the poison takes over again."

"Save your strength," he answered gruffly, pulling her closer to him.

"No, listen to me!" Cami blurted. She could feel herself slipping way again. She fought to catch her breath. "I know you still love her. I know that I'll never compare to her..."

"Don't say that," Ronon growled.

She could feel his anger, but she continued to push. "I don't...have much time," she gasped, as the glow around him intensified once again.

"Yes, you do," he persisted angrily. "Stop talking like this. I already told you, I won't let you die."

He patted her cheek in an effort to keep her awake, but she could feel the strength leaving her body again. Her eyes found his and, for a moment, she felt perfectly safe.

"Don't leave me," she whispered. A rush of darkness slowly began to envelope her, but she wasn't afraid. Not as long as he was there. "Eu te amo."

The last thing she heard before the blackness overtook her was Ronon's guttural roar screaming out her name.


	15. You Look Rather Lost

**No excuses for my very late update other than real life sucks sometimes. :( **

**As always thank you for continuing to stick with me, leaving reviews and subscribing to story alerts. It means a lot to me that you are enjoying the story. :)**

**renzei27: Don't worry about it! :D I know this isn't soon enough, but I hope you like it. :)**

**Quick recap: When we last left off, Cami had been impaled by a poisoned spear. As the poison starts to take effect, Cami leaves Ronon with some very choice words right before she passes out…**

* * *

><p>She shot up in bed, her eyes wide with fear as she gasped for breath. What had happened? Where was she? Machines beeped loudly around her, and she clawed at her arms and chest, tearing off the medical tubes and pads attached to her skin.<p>

"Captain? Captain Buchanan?" A young woman with long brown hair pulled back in a ponytail walked into the room. A stethoscope hung around her neck, and she wore a white lab coat.

"Where's Carson?" She had no idea who this man, Carson, was but she had a feeling that only he could help her.

The woman's features scrunched up in confusion. "Carson? But he's – "

"Buchanan," a man called out, and she turned in bed to face him. He ran a hand through his unruly dark hair, blue eyes looking at her in concern.

She jumped out of bed, asking again for Carson. There was a sharp pain in her left shoulder, and she briefly looked down to see a dark, crimson stain seep through her white tunic top. She ignored it, focusing on the two strangers in front of her who appeared to be trying to calm her down. She noticed that the woman hid a needle behind her back as she inched her way closer.

"Buchanan," the man repeated, arms held out to show he wasn't going to hurt her. "You're injured. Just get back in bed. I'll, uh…I'll go find Carson for you."

He grabbed her arm, and she reacted violently. Right hook to the side of his face followed by a low kick to his stomach. He fell to the floor writhing in pain.

"Colonel!" the woman yelped in surprise, kneeling down next to him.

As she ran out into the hallway, she saw him tap at his radio and yell out, "Ronon! Get your ass to the infirmary! Buchanan just woke up, she's – "

But what he said next, she didn't hear. She ran aimlessly down hallway after hallway, not really knowing where she was going. Her chest heaved as she struggled to catch her breath. The adrenaline had numbed the pain in her shoulder, but she could feel the warm blood trickling down her arm, leaving a dotted trail as she padded down yet another corridor.

She spotted a couple of soldiers running up the stairs ahead of her, and she backtracked her steps. She turned down a long passageway that was surprisingly empty. The only sounds were her breathing and the slapping of her bare feet against the cold floor. And then…

"Camila."

She stopped, recognizing that booming voice instantly. It was the man in her…dreams? No, that wasn't right. She had touched him, been in his arms. He was real, and he would help her. She turned around slowly. For a moment, neither talked nor moved.

His light shirt and dark pants hugged his muscles. That same ethereal glow surrounded him, magnifying his stature. He held her gaze, green eyes intense and full of worry. He stood at the other end of the hallway as if waiting for her to go to him. She obliged.

"Please," she whispered. "You have to help me." She grabbed his proffered hand and gripped it tightly. "Help me find Carson. Please, I…"

She felt the stab of a needle pierce her arm. The young woman from before was at her side injecting her with some sort of sleeping medication. The liquid worked quickly. She felt her legs give out on her, and he scooped her up in his arms.

His strength enveloped her, and she closed her eyes, knowing that he would take care of her. He would find Carson, and it would all be alright.

* * *

><p>Cami's eyelids felt dreadfully heavy as she slowly opened her eyes. She blinked a few times, frowning against the brightness of the lights. When her eyesight finally adjusted, the first thing she saw was a mop of very familiar short, light brown hair. She frowned, looking around the room to make sure she was still on Atlantis.<p>

"What the hell are _you _doing here?" she whispered hoarsely, causing the person to stir. She winced slightly at the pain in her throat. It felt dry and raspy, like she hadn't talked in days.

"Nice to see you, too, Cam," Cruz replied, arching his back and raising his arms over his head to stretch.

"I'm serious," she replied, making an attempt to get up only to realize that her wrists and ankles were tethered to the bed. "What the hell is going on? What happened?"

Her brother leaned over her, untying the restraints before going back to his seat next to her bed. She sat up, rubbing at the raw skin on her wrists.

"I don't know if I'm the person to tell you. I only just got here two days ago," Cruz tried to explain.

"But _why _are you here?" she asked, unable to keep the frustration from her voice.

Cruz was saved from answering when Dr. Keller walked into the room. The doctor held a data tablet in her hand, offering Cami a reassuring smile as she made her way to the side of Cami's bed.

"Good to see you're finally awake, Captain," Keller said, making a pretense of checking Cami's IV bag and them moving on to check her vitals.

"'Finally?' I don't understand. How long have I been out?"

"About five days," Sheppard announced as he walked in. There was a yellow and purplish tinge surrounding his left eye.

Cami took a deep breath to collect herself. She noted that her left arm was in a sling. Okay, it was easy to see she had been injured in their last mission. But that didn't explain why she had been unconscious for the past five days.

She let out a low sigh. "Can someone please tell me what happened before I start freaking out?"

"What's the last thing you remember?" Sheppard asked as he sat on the edge of her bed.

Cami closed her eyes for a few seconds. They were getting ready for a mission. She remembered double checking the ammo magazines in her pistols before holstering them. Then, they were in a forest. McKay had forgotten something, and she and Ronon had to accompany him back to the jumper.

"Wraith," she said, opening her eyes. "I was flying the jumper, and we managed to escape them. We came back to look for you and Teyla, but I got too close to the magnetic field. I crashed the jumper."

"And?" Sheppard prompted.

"There's more?" Cami shook her head. "That's the last thing I remember. Is that how I hurt my arm? In the crash?"

"You might wanna sit down for this, kid," he said with a wry smile considering she was already sitting down. "From what Ronon and McKay told me, after the crash, the three of you set out to look for us on foot, but you got ambushed by Kinji. You got impaled by one of their spears and had to fall back to the jumper."

"Ronon removed the spear," Keller interjected. "The loss of blood coupled with the poison from the spearhead caused you to hallucinate and eventually lose consciousness."

"How did we get back to Atlantis?" Cami asked.

Sheppard cleared his throat. "Well, according to McKay, Ronon went ballistic after you passed out. Ran out of the jumper killing any Kinji warrior that got in his way, and tracked Lorne's team who had already met up with me and Teyla. Brought you straight to the infirmary."

Cami frowned at Sheppard's description of Ronon's behavior, sure that he was exaggerating. She looked down at the bed and then her gaze moved to her wrists and ankles.

"Why was I tied to the bed?"

Dr. Keller hesitated slightly before answering. "You have to understand that the only information we had on hand was Dr. Beckett's analysis of Major Lorne. Apparently, the poison is not so much a poison as it is a drug. Your injury caused it to flow through your blood stream at a much faster rate than normal. Your reaction to the drug was much more…pronounced, for lack of a better word, than Major Lorne's."

"What does that mean?" Cami sat up straighter in bed.

"Of the five days that you've been here, the first two you were in and out of consciousness," Keller continued to explain. "You were constantly thrashing, and you broke your stitches a few times. On one occasion, you jumped out of bed looking for Dr. Beckett. Colonel Sheppard and I tried to get you back in bed."

"You've got a hell of a right hook, kid," Sheppard said, rubbing the side of his face.

"God, Sheppard, I'm sorry. I – "

"Wasn't fully aware of what you were doing?" Sheppard interrupted with a crooked smile. "It's okay. Don't worry about it. Weirdly enough, Ronon was the only one who could calm you down."

He shot her a knowing look, but she averted his gaze. There were still a million questions going through her mind, and it was a great time to change the subject.

"Did you and Teyla find the ZPM?"

"Unfortunately, we don't even know if there even _is_ a ZPM. After we lost communications, we decided to continue forward. Teyla and I found a sort of shrine, but we couldn't get close enough to see what it held. For all we know, the Kinji warriors are protecting a ZPM without really knowing what it is or what it does. We managed to get out of there without being detected…though I think that was in large part because, by the time we got to that shrine, you guys had already caused all that commotion with the crash."

Well, that had answered pretty much all her questions. Except…

"Why is Cruz here? Was I…was I that bad?" she whispered. Her brother, who had remained quiet throughout the explanation, shifted in his seat next to her bed and placed his hand over hers.

"Ronon contacted me and told me you had been injured," Cruz spoke up. "Took a while to get here. Had to get clearance and all that other official bullshit." He eyed Sheppard, but the Colonel only smirked. "I was granted a month of shore leave. Didn't know if you would ever…" He trailed off, clearing his throat, and Cami nodded in understanding.

"So, that's it, then?" she concluded. "Am I free to go?"

Keller smiled ruefully as she shook her head. "Sorry, Captain. I need to keep you overnight for observation." Cami opened her mouth to protest, but the doctor held up a hand to stop her. "However, I'll allow you the luxury of visitors on the condition that you remain in bed."

"I'll go let the gang know that you're awake," Sheppard said, getting off the bed as Keller went back to her office. "Ronon, especially, was concerned about you." He offered her a sly wink before leaving the infirmary.

"So, Ronon, huh?" Cruz asked once they were they only two in the room.

"Ronon…what?" Cami asked, frowning at her brother.

"I mean, you and Ronon…" Cruz trailed off, holding out a hand as if that explained everything.

"What are you talking about? Me and Ronon what?" she asked, taking great interest in adjusting the straps of her sling.

"Come on, Cami, don't play coy with me. I'm your twin. I can sense things from you."

She let out a snort of amusement. "Cruz, trust me, there's nothing going on between me and Ronon."

"Are you sure about that?"

"Very." Her thoughts drifted to the last time she had been alone with Ronon. The fire of his kiss still burned through her veins but it was quickly followed by the sharp sting of rejection. "Something happened that made me fairly certain that he doesn't…wait…" She narrowed her eyes at him, suddenly suspicious of his insinuations. "Why are you asking?"

"Because he had me translate something that you told him while you were hallucinating."

"Translate? God, I talked to him in Portuguese?" Cami tried to think back on any conversations she might have had with Ronon while she was hallucinating but, for the life of her, she just couldn't remember one damn thing. "Wow, and he actually remembered what I said?"

"Not everything," Cruz confessed. "He told me there were some things you said that he couldn't remember or pronounce. But, right before you passed out, you grabbed him and forced him to listen."

"And what did I say?" Cami asked quietly, almost afraid of the answer.

"That, uh…that you love him."

"No!" Cami gasped, gripping her brother's arm. "Cruz, please tell me you're joking."

"Cam, he said it word for word. 'Eu te amo'."

"Fuck!" She ignored the odd stares from a couple of nurses that had walked into the room. "Wait! Maybe it's okay. I was hallucinating, right? I mean, that totally discredits anything I said while under the influence."

Cruz shrugged. "If that makes you feel better, then yeah, sure, you were just talking out of your ass." He paused as if for dramatic effect and then continued on. "Except you actually do love him."

"No, it was just the poison talking," she emphasized. "See, it happened to Major Lorne, too, like a month back. He wouldn't stop complimenting me. Went off about how beautiful I was and he even tried to kiss me. He was hallucinating, Cruz. He didn't actually mean any of it."

She smiled at him, happy that she had resolved that minor dilemma. Ronon didn't actually think she meant to say that, did he? No, no, of course he didn't. He had seen Lorne first hand, knew the way the poison worked with the mind. And, according to Keller, Cami's reaction had been even worse than Lorne's. Even more reason to deny the validity of her statement.

Cruz dropped the subject when one of the nurses came by to check Cami's stitches. Cruz winked at her and the nurse blushed, almost knocking into the IV stand. She righted herself, her face beet red before making her exit.

"Nice girl. Not my type, though."

"Really?" Cami asked, quirking an eyebrow at him. "She was breathing." He rolled his eyes at her. "Jesus, Cruz, you've been here two days, and you're already trying to get in someone's pants?"

"I'm on shore leave. I can do whatever I want."

"Like flirt with the nurses while your sister was unconscious?"

"What do you take me for?" Cruz asked, placing his hand over his heart in mock hurt. "I didn't flirt until _after_ I knew you were okay."

Cami smiled, ruffling his hair as she leaned back against the pillows. "God it's good to have you here. So much has happened this past month…I don't think I realized how much I missed you until I saw you here."

"It's good to be here," he said, squeezing her hand. His gaze suddenly moved to the door, and he straightened up, running a hand through his hair in an attempt to comb it.

"Cami, I came over as soon as John told us the great news," Teyla said, offering them both a smile as she neared the bed. "Major Buchanan, it is good to see you again."

A lopsided grin appeared at the corner of Cruz's mouth, and he opened his mouth to reply when he was cut off by Cami's gasp of surprise.

"You made Major? When did this happen?" she exclaimed, punching her brother in the arm.

"I told you in the letter I sent with the whisky bottles and haggis," Cruz hastily explained, looking a little annoyed that she had interrupted his conversation with Teyla.

"I do not want to take much of your time," Teyla intervened. "I know you two must have a lot to catch up on. I am happy that you are doing much better."

"Thanks for coming, Teyla. Doctor Keller's keeping me overnight so I'm really glad you took the time to stop by."

Teyla squeezed Cami's shoulder warmly, inclined her head at Cruz and took her leave.

"You might want to roll your tongue back in your mouth," Cami said dryly, shaking her head at him.

"Now, Teyla is exactly who I'm talking about when I say I have a type," Cruz remarked still staring at the door.

"Nu-uh. Teyla's off limits. She's with Sheppard."

"Really? I mean, I've only been here two days, both of which were spent here in the infirmary with you, but they didn't seem like a couple to me."

"That's because Sheppard is too dumb to realize he's in love with her," Cami clarified as if it was the most obvious thing in the world.

"He's not the only dumb one around here," Cruz mumbled under his breath.

Cami had been too busy adjusting the straps of her sling again to hear what her brother had said. "What?"

"Nothing, never mind. I just think that if Colonel Sheppard has feelings for her, then he should act on them. Teyla's a beautiful woman and sooner or later someone is going to come along and sweep her off her feet. And that someone may or may not be me," Cruz finished with a wink.

She shot him a glare. "Teyla is not the kind of woman who will fall for your wily charms or douche-y one liners." Cami crossed her arms over her chest as Evan walked into the room. A sudden idea popped into her head as Evan stopped to say hi to Dr. Keller. "Cruz, you have to ask Teyla out for dinner."

Cruz snorted. "I thought you said she was off limits," he countered, his brow furrowing in confusion.

Cami could feel a silly grin forming on her face as a plan began to formulate in her head. She noticed Evan making his way to her bed so she leaned to the side so that only her brother would hear her.

"Exactly."


	16. That's What Scares Me

**AN: First off, a million apologies for the very, very late update. Writer's block can be a b*tch sometimes. Though, I'm happy to announce that I'm back! The next chapter is partially written, and I'm hoping to get back on a schedule where I can update frequently.**

**Second, a big THANK YOU to Ellathia Croft and DOUMBEA, who gave me the inspiration to continue writing. And last, but definitely not least, to one of my best friends, quantumparadigm, who helped me out with this chapter when my mind was wandering with other things. If you guys are looking for a good Ronon/OC story, search for quantumparadigm's "Never Surrender". One of the best SGA fics out there! **

**Alright, that's enough of me talking. Here's the next chapter!**

**Military term - Scuttlebutt: gossip**

* * *

><p>"I can't promise that Teyla won't fall in love with me," Cruz said as they made their way down a hallway. Cami was giving her brother a tour, of sorts, of Atlantis though she had admitted that her knowledge of the city was limited.<p>

Cami rolled her eyes at him. "It's not a date," she repeated for what seemed like the hundredth time. "It's just a friendly dinner."

"I don't know, Cami. Two people having dinner together _by themselves_. Sounds like a date to me."

She thought about that for a second. It only had to _look _like a date for Sheppard's sake, but Cami didn't want Teyla to think it actually was. As much as she wanted to believe Teyla wouldn't fall for Cruz's sappy romance crap, Cami knew that her brother was very persuasive when he wanted to be. She needed to convince Teyla that they were only going for a friendly dinner while at the same time making it seem like it was a date to anyone else looking from the outside in.

"How about I join you guys?"

"What? Like a third wheel?" Cruz scoffed.

"No," Cami said, barely resisting the urge to roll her eyes at him again. "I mean that I'll invite someone to dinner, too. That way, with the four of us, it will seem more like friends going to dinner than a date."

"You _really _don't want me alone with Teyla, do you?" her brother asked with a raised eyebrow. He gave her a crooked grin when she nodded. "Alright, fine. So who're you gonna ask? Ronon?"

Cami felt a pang in her heart. Ronon was the only one who hadn't visited her after she had woken up in the infirmary. Even McKay had taken the time to see her. She was afraid that she might have scared Ronon off with her declaration of love, and she wanted to explain to him that she hadn't meant what she said. Granted, her heart raced every time she thought of him, and she had admitted to herself, albeit a little begrudgingly, that she was falling for him. Now that she thought better of it, a little distance would probably be best and help her get over her little infatuation.

"No, not Ronon," she said with a shake of her head. She looked down at her sling, glad that it could be used as something other than medical equipment. It also allowed her look away from an unpleasant topic of conversation on the pretense of adjusting the straps.

"Seriously?" her brother asked skeptically. "Who then?"

Cami shrugged. "I don't know. I haven't really made many friends, other than my team members." _And Carson_, she wanted to add but decided not to. She had come to terms with Carson's death in her own way, and it still hurt to think about him. "I'm still thinking about who – "

"Hey, guys!" a voice called out from behind them, and they both turned to see Evan walking towards them. "We're still on for Friday, right? I'm afraid I won't take being unconscious as an excuse to miss the poker game this time," he joked.

"Very funny," Cami retorted, though her face held the hint of a smile. "Yeah, we'll be there. Cruz sent me some whisky a while back, and I was going to take a bottle."

"Sounds great. I'm actually on my way to see the requisitions officer. I'm gonna try to haggle him for a case of beer."

"Wow, this sounds more like a party than a poker game," Cruz said with a grin. "I'm definitely asking for a transfer as soon as I get back." He put an arm around her shoulders. "Hey, Evan, if the requisitions officer still needs some convincing, you can offer him a date with Cami. She's looking for someone to have dinner with her tonight."

Cami elbowed her brother in the ribs, hard enough for him to double over. Though his laugh made her think she didn't hit him hard enough.

"It's not a date," she quickly explained. "It's just a friendly dinner with Cruz and Teyla."

"Ronon turn you down or something?" Evan asked in surprise.

"What? No," Cami said a little annoyed. "Why does everyone automatically assume I'll be inviting Ronon to dinner?"

Evan raised his hands up in defense. "Scuttlebutt says you're an item."

"Well, we're not," she replied, the statement coming out more bitterly than she wanted. "Ugh, why can't people just mind their own business?"

Cruz gave her a pointed look and let out a slight cough. Cami glared at him. Her intentions were pure. Sheppard needed that push in the right direction.

"Well, if you don't find anyone, I'll have dinner with you guys," Evan suggested.

"Really?" Cami asked, grateful that Evan noted that it wasn't a date. "Are you sure? I wouldn't want to – "

"We'll see you in the mess hall at eight," Cruz interrupted, putting his arm around her shoulders again. He offered Evan a halfhearted salute as the major went off in search of the requisitions officer. Then he leaned down to whisper in Cami's ear. "Two can play at this game."

* * *

><p>"What do you think they're laughing about <em>now<em>?" Sheppard glared at the table across the mess hall which had erupted in another round of raucous laughter.

Ronon shrugged, his gaze directed at his meal. He sat hunched over his food tray, idly picking at a piece of meat with a fork. The rest of the food on his plate was left untouched. For some reason, he just wasn't hungry. Which was funny considering he had been starving before going to the mess hall.

"I mean, seriously, he can't be _that _funny," Sheppard continued to grumble.

Ronon spared a glance in the direction of the table that held Sheppard's ire. Camila and her brother were having dinner with Teyla and Lorne. Ronon let out a low grunt.

"So..." Sheppard cleared his throat. "Did you tell Buchanan you found out what she said in Portuguese?"

"I haven't talked to her."

"What? Didn't you go see her in the med bay?"

"I went...but she was busy."

"I really don't see how busy a person can get lying in bed."

"Lorne was there, okay? It seemed like they were having a good conversation so I left. I didn't talk to her." Ronon finally pushed away his food tray, irritated at the direction the conversation had taken. "You up for some sparring? Seem to have lost my appetite."

Sheppard raised an eyebrow at him. "Huh. I think I've found the reason you've been so grumpy these past couple of days." He leaned forward, elbows resting on the table. "You really need to talk to her."

"And you really need to mind your own business," Ronon retorted as another burst of laughter came from Camila's table.

"Seriously, if they laugh one more time, I'm gonna - "

Sheppard trailed off, and this time it was Ronon's turn to raise an eyebrow, an amused expression on his face. "Gonna what? Continue just sitting here _not _talking to Teyla?"

"It has nothing to do with Teyla," Sheppard replied with narrowed eyes. "They're just, uh...disturbing the...quiet of the mess hall..."

"Uh-huh."

"I'm serious!" Sheppard exclaimed. "People are trying to eat here. It's the one place where they can come and enjoy a good meal without being bothered by random laughter coming from other tables."

Ronon let out an exasperated sigh, leaning back in his seat and crossing his arms over his chest. "So _do _something about it then," he growled, tired of having heard Sheppard's whining for the past hour already.

To his surprise, Sheppard stood up. It was almost laughable, the way he was acting - like he had no control over his actions. By this time, Camila and the others had already risen from the table, putting their trays away as they walked across the mess hall. Sheppard approached them awkwardly, and the group stopped, all turning to face him.

He could see his leader opening and closing his mouth a few times, and it seemed to Ronon that Sheppard had no idea what he was doing there. He had gotten up, determined to do something but was at a loss as to what that thing actually was. After a few seconds of Sheppard standing there without saying anything, Ronon finally tapped his earpiece.

"Just repeat everything I say," he whispered to Sheppard.

He saw Sheppard stiffen at Ronon's voice in his ear but gave the slightest nod that only Ronon could see. Ronon took a deep breath, his gaze falling on Camila. Her long dark hair was down, framing her face and falling past her shoulders. A curious look passed over her face as she looked over at Sheppard, who was blocking their exit. Ronon could do nothing but stare at her as he started speaking from his heart.

"Through starry nights and fields of gold/My body wanders ever on/Forever searching, forever seeking/Home," Ronon began.

"What the hell - "

"Just repeat it!" Ronon growled. The mess hall grew immensely quiet as Sheppard complied with Ronon's request.

Camila's light green eyes widened in surprise at Sheppard's recital. She pushed her brother and Lorne back so that it was obvious that Teyla was the one on the receiving end of Sheppard's words. Ronon looked at her pleased expression and couldn't help but wonder if this had all been a ruse to draw Sheppard out...

"Far stars and fair in the skies bending/Low stars of hearth fires and wood smoke ascending/The meadow-lark's nested/The night hawk is winging/Home through the star-shine the hunter comes singing," Ronon continued.

Camila frowned slightly, gaze roving over the mess hall before finally settling on him. But Ronon didn't look away. She knew that it wasn't Sheppard saying those words. She knew that there was someone else on the other end of that line. And, as she looked at him, her expression turned grateful, almost thankful that he was doing this. His eyes locked on hers, and he finished the Satedan poem that he knew by heart...that he had dedicated to her without her even knowing.

"You are my home, my haven, my shelter/For all my searching, all my seeking/I always come back/Home."

Camila turned back to Teyla and Sheppard, and Ronon couldn't help but follow her gaze. Teyla was blushing a bright red at Sheppard's sudden declaration. The whole mess hall erupted in applause once Sheppard finished reciting Ronon's words.

Camila brightened at the conclusion of the poem, grin widening as she gave him a discreet thumbs up.

She didn't know. The poem had been for her, and she would never know. There were so many things left unsaid between them...so many things _he _hadn't said.

Ronon suddenly felt...alone. Sheppard and Teyla now seemed to be together, Rodney was in his own little word, and Camila...well, he really didn't know what to think about her. Had she really meant what she said back on that planet? Or was it just a side effect of the poison?

With a low grunt, he pushed himself off his chair and left the mess hall. There were too many things going on in his head, too many damn things churning through his body. He needed some time to think, to distance himself from Camila and every single emotion that her image provoked.

His feet automatically took him to the one place where he could work everything out and still feel a sense of accomplishment when he was done - the gym. A faint smile touched his lips that didn't quite reach his eyes. All he needed was a good couple of hours exercising and everything would be just fine.

* * *

><p><strong>Another quick note to add that the "Satedan" poem is a combination of a poem a friend of mine wrote (thanks to TheRev28!) and a Native American poem that quantumparadigm researched for me. Also, I don't think I've ever mentioned this...if anyone is interested in what Cami looks like, I have an image of her as my profile avatar. She's based off of model Adriana Lima. Thanks again for your patience in waiting for this chapter and take care!<strong>


	17. You Go First

**AN: This chapter and the next take place during the "Reunion" episode (where Ronon finds his old Satedan squad who are planning an op against the Wraith). I know this episode takes place during the fourth season but I'm moving it up on my timeline. In other words, the fight with the Replicators hasn't happened yet, and Weir is still in charge. As such, this episode will change to include Cami and mainly focus on Ronon leaving (so the events of the episode will be slightly different and the stuff with the Replicators will be ignored).**

**I wanted to thank my best friend, quantumparadigm, who helped me out with some dialogue, for being my soundboard, and being extra patient with me when I have a million questions. :D**

**Also, I'm happy/sad to announce that there are only three more chapters after this! I think that's why I'd been procrastinating with this story...I don't want it to end! :( Anyway, long author's note is long. Enjoy the chapter!. :D**

* * *

><p>Cami peered at Evan over the fanned out cards in her hand. She wasn't much of a poker player, but she knew she had a winning hand – finally. She was already down to the last of her chips, and the current pot would at least make her break even.<p>

Evan narrowed his eyes at her, almost as if he was trying to read her mind, before looking at his own hand. He leaned in lazily, flicking a couple of chips into the pot.

"I see your fifty and raise you thirty more," he said, blue eyes sparkling at the challenge.

Beside him, Cruz barked out a laugh. He downed his drink and reached for the whisky bottle.

"You sure you don't wanna drink?" Cruz asked her. "Maybe if you loosen up a little you'll finally win a game."

She rolled her eyes at him. If anything, being the only sober one should work to her advantage. She let out an exasperated sigh.

"I told you, I'm on call," she reminded him as she placed down her own chips then rested her cards on the table. "Read 'em and weep, boys. Ha, ha!"

Evan let out a low groan and threw his cards down. "One more game," he said, motioning his empty glass toward Cruz, who promptly filled it to the brim.

Cami shook her head at the two men as she gathered up her winnings. The other two guys Evan had invited, Stark and Williams, were already passed out on the floor from the combination of beer and whisky. And, at the rate Evan and Cruz were going, she wouldn't be surprised if they, too, dozed off soon.

"_Buchanan, gear up. Looks like we're going planet side_," Sheppard's voice rang in her ear.

"Thank God," she whispered, her excuse to leave now readily available. She tapped her earpiece in response. "On my way, sir."

She stood up, throwing one last glance at the two men. They had their arms around each other, belting out an old song with their glasses raised high in the air. Cami shook her head again as she left the room, making a mental note never to drink again. Or at least, never to drink _as much _as Evan and Cruz. She met Sheppard in the armory after changing into her usual uniform.

"How's your shoulder?" he asked as he checked his weapons.

She rotated it a couple of times, glad to be free from the sling. "I'm good. Dr. Keller gave me the release yesterday."

"Yeah, she told me. But what I mean is, how do you feel? Are you combat ready?"

"More than ready," she replied, emphasizing her comment by grabbing one of her pistols and field stripping it in under a minute. "You need me to shoot it?"

"Nah, I believe you. Besides, I don't really think you're going to have to."

"What's going on?" she asked worriedly as she holstered her pistols. "Are Teyla and Ronon okay?"

"They're fine," he hurriedly reassured her, holstering his own weapons. "It seems Ronon ran into some old friends who are planning an assault on a Wraith ship."

Cami quickly fell into step beside him as they walked through the hallways. "Wait, what? So the rumors were true? The gang down on that planet that Ronon and Teyla were sent to investigate actually _are _Satedans?"

"And not just any Satedans," her team leader nodded. "They're actually part of Ronon's old military crew. Like I said, they're planning to raid a Wraith ship and apparently need our help."

"Holy shit! What are the odds of Ronon not only running into Satedans but old friends at that?"

"Too good," Sheppard mused.

Her eyes snapped to his face as they reached the gate room. "You think it's a trap, sir?"

"I don't really know what to think," he sighed, pulling her off to the side. "Something doesn't seem right. I have this gut feeling that this is not mere coincidence. I really hope I'm wrong, but I need you to be alert down there. Be my eyes, Buchanan, and let me know what you think. Maybe I'm just reading too much into it..."

"Colonel Sheppard, sir?" Chuck called out from his seat. "The wormhole has been established."

She gave Sheppard a curt nod, took a deep breath and followed him through the gate.

##########

Cami leaned back in her chair, keen eyes roving over Ronon's friends. The leader, Tyre, was very persistent, very adamant in his explanation of the operation. He was cocky, as any squad leader might be, but there was something slightly...off about him. She couldn't quite put her finger on it, but it seemed Sheppard was right. There was more to this than they were letting on.

Meanwhile, Ara and Rakai were your typical military grunts. It was obvious that they looked up to Tyre, and Cami was more than sure that they would follow his orders no matter what, strict Satedan military code notwithstanding.

Her gaze flicked to Ronon. He certainly seemed to be to be happy that he had been reunited with his old squad. But while his face was smiling, his eyes showed a different story. They looked almost sad.

Cami frowned. She didn't like seeing him that way - those somber eyes, those tense muscles. It was almost like she could feel whatever he felt. If he was sad, then her heart felt sad, too. She let out a low sigh of annoyance at the thought. She really needed to stop reading all those romance novels. Next thing she knew, she was going to be envisioning Ronon as a raunchy romance book cover - shirt open to reveal chiseled pecs and abs with his dreadlocks flying in the wind.

The sudden silence at the table pulled Cami from her thoughts. She straightened up in her seat, painfully aware that all eyes were on her. Shit. She'd been too busy staring at Ronon to realize that the conversation had somehow turned to her.

"I'm sorry...what?" she asked innocently, hoping her little staring contest had gone unnoticed.

"I was just asking if you were Ronon's mate," Ara calmly replied.

"I..."

_Fuck_. Cami could feel her face burning. Had she really been that obvious? And what the hell kind of question was that? It was so direct and personal. Unless Ara was asking her for a reason. Maybe she was figuring out the boundaries?

"Not if that guy outside has anything to say about it," Sheppard piped in, and Cami shot him a grateful look. "Thought Buchanan was his bride or something. Practically had to pry him away from her."

"Did the same with Teyla," Ronon remarked. "Looks like you got some competition, Sheppard."

Their leader shrugged. "I'm sure I can take the guy if it came down to a fight."

Cami stood, stretching her arms above her head exaggeratingly. "No guys in my life at the moment, arranged husband or otherwise," she finally answered Ara, then turned to Sheppard. "I'm, uh...I'm gonna go outside and...patrol the perimeter."

It was a lame excuse, she knew, but she really needed to leave the room. Once outside, she continued walking until she found a secluded alleyway. She took a deep breath, closing her eyes and leaning against the back wall of what seemed to be a vegetable stand. God, had she really been that transparent?

She couldn't keep doing this. Not when it was affecting her professional life as well. It was just that _every _time she was near Ronon, all her previous pep talks about forgetting him went out the window.

"...and I don't want it to turn into a big pissing match."

Cami's eyes fluttered open as Sheppard's voice carried into the alleyway. He and Ronon walked by, oblivious to her standing just a few feet away. Cami pushed away from the wall intent on catching up to them.

"Yeah, I keep my group in line, and you do the same for yours," Ronon replied.

The fuck? Since when did Ronon start separating himself from the Atlantis team?

"Last time I checked, it was _your _group too," Sheppard said, gripping the scope of his P90.

"Yeah," Ronon sighed, fidgeting from one foot to the other. After a few seconds, he finally turned to Sheppard. "Look, I was gonna wait to tell you this, but I've made my decision. Once we finish this op, I'm gonna be leaving Atlantis."

Cami's heart stopped. What?! He was _leaving_? As in _forever_? She swallowed hard, forcing herself to replace her shocked expression with one of indifference as she approached them. Neither turned to look at her, and she could feel the tension between them. She needed to step in. Now wasn't the time or place to have this conversation.

"Gee, thanks for helping me out back there, Ronon," she joked, plastering on a fake smile on her face and pretending she hadn't just overheard them. "I really thought your girlfriend was going to eat me alive."

"She's not my girlfriend," Ronon replied, his eyes reluctantly leaving Sheppard's to look at her.

"Huh. Could've fooled me. Well, whatever," she said waving a dismissive arm and walking between them. "You guys headed back?"

After a few strained seconds, Sheppard finally moved. "Yeah, looks like we have an op to prepare for."

"Looks like we have a lot more than an op to prepare for," Cami muttered under her breath and walked past them.

She went up to the DHD and dialed the address to Atlantis. The wormhole swirled as the gate opened. Glancing behind her, she saw that Sheppard had opted to wait for Teyla and McKay on the outskirts of the village. Her gaze then moved to Ronon who was sauntering up to her, and her breath caught in her throat.

The sun was at his back, casting him in some sort of ethereal glow. Every step was sure and calculated. His green eyes were dark and pensive, giving him a dangerous, predatory look. In the space of a heartbeat that lasted an eternity and yet managed to pass all too quickly, his eyes locked with hers.

In that split second, she couldn't breathe. She couldn't move. She couldn't even think.

In that split second, nothing else mattered but the two of them.

And then time resumed back to normal, and he said nothing as his gaze moved away, walking past her and through the gate.

Cami let out a long breath, hand moving to her chest where her heart was beating wildly. Son of a bitch. She couldn't do it. She would never be able to forget him.

She would never be able to let him go.

* * *

><p>He had to leave. There was no reason for him to remain on Atlantis. His fellow Satedans, his friends, needed him. <em>That's <em>what was most important right now. He had made his decision.

The chime on his door rang, and he let out an irritated hiss, jamming some clothing into the open bag on his bed. Now what? He really hoped it wasn't Sheppard trying to pull his little stunt again. The talk they'd had earlier in the mess hall already had Ronon thinking about his decision to leave.

And the last thing he wanted to do was think.

Ronon swiped his hand over the door sensor, and it opened to reveal Camila. She was dressed casually, long hair let loose so that the soft layers fell smoothly down the length of her back. She offered him a small smile, but he frowned at her, crossing his arms over his chest.

So much for not thinking.

"You here to convince me to stay?" he asked with a raised eyebrow.

She ran a hand through her hair, and the smell of exotic flowers filled the air. For a brief moment, his thoughts stray back to their kiss. The feel of her silky hair and the taste of her lips fresh in his mind. If there was anything, _anyone_, who could make him stay, it would be her. He let out an irritated sigh at that last thought, brushing away from the door and getting back to packing. It was ridiculous, the affect she had on him. He muttered a low curse, stuffing some items a little too forcefully into his bag.

"I know better than to convince someone who's already made up their mind," she replied, following him into the room.

Ronon paused in his packing, trying not to show how much that had affected him. He half hoped she would've begged him to stay. "Then why are you here?" he asked, unconsciously crushing the shirt he held in his hands. "To say goodbye?"

"To give you this."

She pulled a paperback book from the back pocket of her jeans and held it out for him. He looked at it for a few seconds before dropping the shirt in his bag and reaching for the book. _Ulysses_, the title read, by Alfred, Lord Tennyson.

"It's a poem," she added. "One I think you'll appreciate considering..." She paused, hooking her thumbs in the loops on the waistband of her pants as she gathered her thoughts. "Well, let's just say that it's something you can relate to."

He accepted the book and placed it carefully in his bag deciding to take a look at it later. "Thanks," he said, walking over to his nightstand to retrieve a poem book of his own. He had intended to just leave it in her room later without her noticing, but she was already in his room. He tossed it over to her. "Here."

"I...thank you."

She sounded genuinely surprised at having gotten something in return and began to flip through the book. Ronon's heart almost stopped. _This _was why he had wanted to give it to her later. If she saw what he had written...but it didn't look like she'd seen his note. She seemed to be flipping through the book more to have something to do than actually focusing on anything. He relaxed a little and went back to his packing.

"So, uh...need any help?" she asked after a few minutes of silence.

"No," he replied tersely.

"Oh...okay."

"What do you want, Camila?" he asked gruffly, growing irritated that she was still hanging around without saying anything. He zipped his bag shut and turned to face her.

"Nothing, I just - "

"Then why are you still here?"

Her green eyes flashed darkly. She opened her mouth to say something, then thought better of it and turned to leave. However, she stopped before reaching the door.

"Why are you really leaving?" she asked quietly. Her head was turned down, but he could sense a hint of anger in her voice.

Ronon let out a low breath, grateful that she still had her back to him. How could he explain the guilt that he felt? He had left his friends to die that day. He was their leader, and he had failed them. "These are my real friends. My _people_. They're all I have left of Sateda."

She whirled around. "Your _real _friends? What about Sheppard? And Teyla and Rodney? What about me?" There was a slight pause. "Are we nothing to you?"

"No," he hissed. "You wouldn't understand."

"Try me," she said, taking a step closer to him.

"My home was destroyed, Camila," he finally said, not wanting for her to know the truth and yet needing for her to understand. "These people are all I have left."

"_Atlantis _is your home. Why can't you - "

"Everyone here seems perfectly willing to let me leave," he interrupted. After all, just a few minutes ago, she'd even asked to help him pack. "My friends _asked _me to go with them." _And_ _I can't leave them behind again,_he silently added.

"Is that what you really think? That we want to see you go?" She took another step towards him.

He ignored her questions, hardly noticing that he was moving closer to her as well. "I thought you weren't here to convince me to stay."

The air grew heavy with tension. It was like there was some sort of static charge between them practically crackling with energy as an invisible magnet pulled them closer together until they were only a few inches from each other.

"I'm not," she said softly, her sweet breath lightly caressing his face. Her green eyes held his, gaze unwavering.

"Then why are you still here?" he whispered huskily. He could feel the warmth of her skin, and he was so tempted to touch her. But he knew that if he did, he wouldn't be able to let her go. And he needed to know... "If you want me to stay, all you have to do is ask."

Neither moved. The energy swirled around them making his flesh erupt in goosebumps. He could see it in her eyes - the same want, the same _need_.

"If you wanted to stay, I wouldn't have to ask," she countered quietly.

"Why is it so hard for you to ask me to stay?" he pressed. He needed to hear the words, needed to confirm that what he was seeing and feeling was _real_.

"Why is it so easy for you to want to leave?"

He let out an irritated sigh. This conversation was going nowhere. And yet he still couldn't move away. Her brows furrowed slightly as her eyes searched his.

"What are you so afraid of?" she finally asked.

He clenched down on his jaw, suddenly reminded of that conversation long ago when he had asked her to describe him just by looking in his eyes. He remained silent, trying hard to keep the swirl of emotions from reaching his eyes.

A resigned look passed over her face. After a few more seconds, she gave him a sad smile, taking his silence as the answer she'd been looking for. She turned and walked away, this time not hesitating when she reached the door.

Ronon could do nothing but watch her leave. He stared at the door for what seemed like an eternity before sitting down on his bed. Letting out a low breath, he ran his hands over his face. If she had wanted him to stay, she would've said it. He punched a pillow in frustration. Why was she so stubborn? Why couldn't she just say what she clearly wanted to?

_For the same reason you didn't say anything_.

Ronon sighed in frustration. He couldn't deny his feelings for her. She had awoken something in him that he hadn't felt in such a long time. Only this was...different. His feelings for Camila were much stronger, much more powerful than anything he had ever felt before.

And it was only then that he realized exactly how much she really meant to him...and exactly how much he would miss her when he left.

"It's you, Camila," he whispered to the empty room. "I'm afraid of you."


	18. You Would've Done the Same

**AN: Just a reminder that this is a continuation of the "Reunion" episode. Special thanks to quantumparadigm for helping me out with the dialogue! Also, I apologize for the delay and the short chapter. I promise, the next one will more than make up for it! ;)**

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><p>Cami ripped open the door to her locker, muttering under her breath as she reached in for her equipment. <em>You're so stupid, Buchanan! You should've said something, <em>anything_!_And then...what? Ronon was going to magically announce his own feelings for her? She shook her head. It was fairly obvious those feelings were non-existent. His insistence on leaving Atlantis showed her as much.

_You were supposed to forget about him_, she thought angrily as she grabbed her tank top, the thin material almost tearing as she forcefully pulled it over her head. But no matter how many times she tried to forget, she just...couldn't. No, not couldn't. Wouldn't.

She let out a frustrated sigh, throwing the poetry book he had given her into her locker before changing into her cargo pants. While her mind was intent on leaving her feelings for Ronon behind, her heart was another story. Why was it so hell bent on loving Ronon when _she _clearly didn't want to? She slammed the locker close with such force that the door hit the latch and bounced back open.

"Whoa there, kid. What'd the locker ever do to you?" Sheppard asked, walking in and moving to his own locker.

Cami raked back the wisps of hair that had escaped her ponytail. "Sorry, it's just...I talked to Ronon."

"Oh?" Sheppard asked as he changed shirts. "Don't tell me...he's still stubbornly insisting on leaving."

"Yep," she replied. "I just...I really thought..." She paused, drawing out a long breath before she said too much.

"You thought he had a legitimate reason to stay?"

"Well, yeah. I mean, I understand why he wants to leave. Those are his people." She sat down on the bench in front of her locker to pull on her boots. "But we're his people, too. How could he just leave so easily?"

Sheppard crossed his arms over his chest and leaned against his locker. "Did you ask him to stay?"

"Did you?" she countered.

He huffed out a laugh. "I think your word means more to him than mine."

"What's that supposed to mean?"

"Geez, kid, do I have to spell it out for you? Look, I'm just sayin', if you'd asked him to stay, he would've."

Cami shook her head, tying the laces on her boots a little too tightly. "Ronon's too busy living in the past to look towards the future. Or the present, for that matter."

"Been there, done that," he said, letting out an exaggerated sigh, then moving to sit next to her. "It took me a long time to notice that what I wanted, what I _needed _was right in front of me all along."

"Yeah, but it was so obvious to everyone that you and Teyla had feelings for each other."

"Obvious to everyone but me, apparently. Sometimes it's easy to see things in others that we can't see in ourselves."

"What? Now that you're with Teyla that makes you an expert on romance?" she asked sardonically.

"I'm only calling it how I see it, kid." He shifted on the bench to turn towards her. "You have to tell him how you feel before it's too late."

A soft smile touched Cami's lips as she remembered telling Sheppard those exact same words just a few months ago. Then her smile faltered when she remembered the day the conversation had taken place...the day Carson had died.

Life was too short. She'd experienced that first hand. And now Ronon was leaving. Forever.

"I can't," she said softly.

"Snipers really _do _make the worst romancers," Sheppard said dramatically. "They never make the first move."

She frowned at him. "It's not that easy."

His shoulder bumped hers. "It really is."

"No," she said, getting up and pacing in front of him. "It's not. What's easy is just not saying anything. Ronon's leaving and never coming back. He can go off and live his life and not have to worry about the stupid girl back on Atlantis who's madly in love with him."

"Holy shit, you love him?"

_Fuck_. "I...I didn't..."

"I mean, I knew you had feelings for him, but this is bigger than I thought," Sheppard continued.

"I don't even know how it happened!" she said, throwing up her hands. She slumped back onto the bench finally succumbing to the truth. "It just snuck up on me."

"Oh, the irony." Sheppard turned his laugh into a cough when he saw the confused look on her face. "You know, 'cause you're a sniper...and _you're _the one usually sneaking up...never mind."

She rolled her eyes at him. "Yeah, well, as a sniper, I'm used to spotting things 500 meters away, not right in front of me."

"You have to tell him."

"I can't," she repeated, resting her elbows on her lap and hanging her head. "He _wants_to leave. And I'm not selfish enough to hold him back."

"So you're just gonna let him go?"

Cami looked down at the floor. "Yep."

"And then?"

"And then I eat gallons of chocolate ice cream, get over it, and move on." She shrugged like it was no big deal.

Sheppard scoffed. "Wow."

"What?" Her head snapped up to look at him.

"Nothing, I just..." He shook his head. "I really thought you were braver than that."

"Excuse me?"

"You can take down a group of Kinji warriors in a heartbeat, but you can't face Ronon and tell him how you really feel?"

"When I'm on the field, it's just me, my gun, and the target. No feelings involved. When I'm with Ronon..." She trailed off.

"Hey, if true love was easy, we'd all have it."

Cami raised an eyebrow at him. "You seriously have to stop spewing out these platitudes."

He gave her a crooked grin. "You still have time to talk to Ronon, you know. He's probably in the armory right now getting ready for the op."

"I can't do it," she said, shaking her head.

"And why the hell not?"

"Because!"

"Because what?"

"Because he doesn't love me," she whispered. She pushed off the bench, grabbed her jacket and stormed out.

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><p>Ronon leaned into the balcony, forearms resting on the railing as he thumbed through the book Camila had given him. <em>Ulysses<em>. The story about a man who returned home after a long journey, only to realize that it wasn't where he wanted to be.

She'd deliberately chosen that poem for him. She'd known.

His gaze moved out to the ocean. The sun lay low in the sky and, for once, he appreciated the beauty in the scenery. Countless planets he had visited and he had never once taken the time to enjoy the view. He let out a satisfied sigh finally feeling at rest - finally truly home.

"It is beautiful, is it not?" Teyla asked softly from behind him.

He nodded as she joined him. "Can't believe it took me this long to notice it."

"Some things take time before you learn to appreciate them," Teyla said knowingly. "How are you faring?"

He shrugged. "I was angry...disappointed in my friends. But mostly disappointed in myself." He let out a harsh laugh. "I should've known it was too good to be true. I got caught up in the thought of feeling like I was finally home."

"Yes," Teyla replied. "It must have been a difficult decision to make - to leave Atlantis. To remain with those you feel you truly belong with."

"It's funny," he said, straightening up but not moving away from the railing. His eyes still observing the setting sun. "The way things turn out. All these years of looking for lost friends, of wanting to go back home...only to realize that I was home all along."

Teyla nodded in understanding. "I know the feeling."

"Was it hard for you?" he asked, turning to her. "Was it hard to leave your people behind?"

"It was...difficult," Teyla admitted. "Until I realized that I did not leave them behind. They remain with me. In my heart, in my very being." She patted his hand reassuringly. "I do not regret my decision to remain on Atlantis. It is now my home and, with it, I have found a new family."

"Like Sheppard?" he asked with a wry smile.

"Like Sheppard," Teyla agreed with a slight blush. "I must thank you for that beautiful poem you had him recite."

He grinned mischievously. "How did you - "

"John is not the poetic type," Teyla interrupted with a laugh. "Though am I wrong in assuming that poem was not meant for me?"

"I..." He let out another sigh as he looked back out at the ocean. "I had someone else in mind as I was reciting it."

"I see." She stared at him for a few seconds before her gaze, too, moved away. "Have you told her how you really feel?"

Ronon shifted uncomfortably. "It's...difficult."

Teyla gave him a warm smile, then reached over and gave his arm a sympathetic squeeze. "All things worth keeping are."


End file.
